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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Soul-Tapedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Mieko
    Elite Ratio:    3.98 - 253/209/99
    Words: 103
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 874
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 608



    Description:
       This is a (Creative writing) assignment. Obviously or not, we were supposed to be writing a "description" about our soul. This popped out. I know it's very depressing. I didn't mean to. I swear. But I kinda looked at it and went, "nah, that's cool. PRINT."


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSoul-Tapedots
    -------------------------------------------


    My soul is taped to my fingers;

    To keep it from flying away...



    There are many things I will not say,

    There are many things I can not do.

    Sometimes forgetting to love,

    Or just loving to forget.

    One word: contradiction --


    My soul shows up like a wavery light...

    Colors bright, dark, and blending.

    Thoughts like the backroads, neverending...

    It feels like a whirlpool, a bolt of

    lightning...terrifying.




    Submitted on 2006-11-03 23:54:03     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      And so I have read it aloud to myself with a cold voice to feel the chill I seek from it and expect because again, it is that good.
    I mainly say that coming from reading and sounding word for word.

    "I don't think its depressing at all, its like you have alot of energy that you're harnessing."

    chemberdan --kim

    I can also take the moment to shine a little more light on that piece of commentary.

    | Posted on 2010-12-30 00:00:00 | by Rex Gold | [ Reply to This ]
      There are many things I cannot say.There are many things I cannot do.I related to those lines and this made me think of the color of my soul which is like ocean water blue but it reflects pain but wants to give love.Wwhen you say your soul is taped to your fingertips I believe that b/c Our souls and spirits are nothing on this earth without our bodies.You did the right thing by writing this one.So I believe you would still say you made a good piece without you knowing it which is a little funny to me. 5stars from me.You've earned it. RG
    | Posted on 2008-03-05 00:00:00 | by Rex Gold | [ Reply to This ]
      I thinks theres an interesting idea here in this poem. I do think the ideas in it are a little scattered, going from tape, to colors, to contradiction. While the theme of the poem, your soul, is apparent by the repetition of the word, it doesn't seem quite...connected. Do you get what I'm trying to say? I guess it's good for a quick write for an assignment, but it doesn't seem to have much thought or emotion behind it.
    | Posted on 2007-06-12 00:00:00 | by Waywarddaughter | [ Reply to This ]
      The visual of "my soul is taped to my fingers" is most definitely extremely creative. It was an excellent hook. The entire poem didn't measure up the the expectations the opening line set, but it was good. Not great, but good.

    melora
    | Posted on 2007-03-19 00:00:00 | by Melora | [ Reply to This ]
      I like this piece,
    I don't know what your intention with this poem was but my interpretation is your having difficulty understanding your soul (or thoughts)

    "My soul is taped to my fingers;

    To keep it from flying away..."

    I really liked the visual that this produced for me, you had my attention from the beginning


    "My soul shows up like a wavery light...

    Colors bright, dark, and blending.

    Thoughts like the backroads, neverending...

    It feels like a whirlpool, a bolt of

    lightning...terrifying."

    What a great way to end the poem, it would not have been half as effective if you did not end with the word Terrifying.
    Sometime all it takes is one word to complete a work.
    Great write,
    Thanks,
    Will
    | Posted on 2007-01-18 00:00:00 | by Twice | [ Reply to This ]
      This a very intresting and a good one, I love your opening lines. I don't think its depressing at all, its like you have alot of energy that you're harnessing. Without the tape you're soul would just get lost because of its nature to experience everything. Sometimes we have to ground ourselves so we can participate in the everyday.

    --kim
    | Posted on 2006-11-05 00:00:00 | by chemberdan | [ Reply to This ]


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