[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Killing Timedots

    Author: cuddledumplin
    ASL Info:    36/ f/UK
    Elite Ratio:    4.08 - 6269/5927/526
    Words: 45
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 901
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 297


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsKilling Timedots

    People talk of killing time.
    I wish we could
    or at least paralyze it
    for I'm getting old,
    but I feel so young,
    and I think you're tired
    of this face,
    for I know I am,
    and that causes
    these impossible dreams.

    Submitted on 2004-05-27 18:52:50     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      wouldn't it be interesting if we could paralyze time. what would we do with it? it does seem that life goes by awfully fast sometimes; seems quicker the older you get, too. i was thinking about my parents the other day, they are in their 70's. what must it feel like to know that you've lived way longer than you have left. kinda scary, i would think. i look in the mirror sometimes and see new wrinkles and think, damn, i look old! anyway, this was an interesting muse on time and the fear of getting old. for one, though, i am not tired of your face!
    | Posted on 2004-05-28 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      gorgeous as always....*sniff* I'm getting old too but the secret to staying young is a daily dose of cartoons! really!
    | Posted on 2004-05-27 00:00:00 | by pyrestarter | [ Reply to This ]
      "You only as old as you feel inside." That's what my Mom always says and it's really true! So if you feel young then you are young. Good job. This poem is short, sweet, and well-written. I just love your work!
    | Posted on 2004-05-27 00:00:00 | by borderlinetears | [ Reply to This ]
      I am right behind ya (27). This is an honest piece. One great metaphor, and your personality, which flows through this piece. I only have one suggestion.
    -And that causes these
    Impossible dreams.
    Have you read How Soon Hath Time by John Milton.
    It is one of my favorites, but it's by one of those old stuffy British poets that most these days don't seem to like. Anyway, it wrestles with the same subject.
    Thought-provoking. Emotion stirring. Nice Work!
    | Posted on 2004-05-27 00:00:00 | by nicelyJ | [ Reply to This ]
      Hm...I like your other works better. This one is perhaps a little too...descriptive or precise, or realistic, or maybe more hesitating than the usual but there's something in it that doesn't quite fit.
    | Posted on 2004-05-27 00:00:00 | by the apocrypha | [ Reply to This ]
      I liked this. Once again your short simple poems work because they are the opposite of mine (long and strange) Only thing I can think of is that it could use some punctuation to help the flow but that's it. Good job! (by the way, I don't mind growing old, it's just another thing I haven't experienced yet so it's interesting! maybe that's just because I'm young)
    | Posted on 2004-05-27 00:00:00 | by ACircuitShock | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh I definitely can identify with this one. If only I was a young as I feel. I used to think thirty five was ancient, Now it's staring me in the face. Do we have to act our age?
    | Posted on 2004-05-27 00:00:00 | by jaycee | [ Reply to This ]
      I can't identify with it, being only 16 myself, but its well done, (Though yes, does seem to lack something) and Cuddle? We never tire of your face. Oh..wait...thats legs...hmm...O.o oh well! ~Sicobe R. Crow
    | Posted on 2004-05-31 00:00:00 | by Crow | [ Reply to This ]
      very cool thoughts... i went through a phase of hating time so much i wanted to kill it and i wrote it all sorts of evil hate letters and everything though it had nothing to do with getting old. however this is an awesome write, very honest and full of fears but life is what we make it and so just do it... grab hold of every moment and live out your dreams as best you can! and thats about all i have to say... great write!
    | Posted on 2004-05-29 00:00:00 | by Someones Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
      I'm a bit disappointed - it lacks something, some kind of flow, and the whole thought, you are absolutely right but the way you presented it didn't move me too much. Sorry, it just hasn't got the power of previous pieces I read. With all my love, Greg.
    | Posted on 2004-05-31 00:00:00 | by Nightraven | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    The Promise written by annie0888
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    Push written by JanePlane
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    Incubus written by monad
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    To written by SavedDragon
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    Giving written by jjd
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    This written by Chelebel
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]