Beguile Me, Please! by Kristen Gudsnuk

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Submission Name: Beguile Me, Please! dots

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Author:	Kristen Gudsnuk
ASL Info:	21/f/CT
Elite Ratio:	5.62 - 182/229/86
Words:	179

Class/Type:	Poetry/Happy
Total Views:	1203
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	1260

Description:
if I told you what inspired this, well then *poof* goes all my street cred. ^_^ it's about how humans romanticize things, and isn't that so much better than truth? who needs truth anyway? isn't it so much nicer to believe in god? and as someone *embarrassing to name who* once said, it's so much harder to believe in something than to doubt, even if you get disappointed, you have to believe.
I still don't believe in god...
...but I'm toying with the idea.

Beguile Me, Please! dots

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There's such beauty in expression!
It makes me doubt everything, maybe there
Is a god... only, what an inferior god!
How is it that humans have managed to improve
So drastically this slapdash world of ours?

How is it, that through the lens of an
Optimistic, rainbowed human eye
Ugly piles of stone and dirt
Become proud, glorious mountains?

It's the silence of a cramped metro,
Pregnant with words never spoken:
Half-expressed emotions, echoing quietly into the air

A cold, dark theatre becomes
A portal to magic, to love, to times past

Soft burgundy velvet, pungent with age,
And yellowed, brittle lace
And tarnished silver rings
All mutter with lovely ghosts, brooding spectres
Of worlds far-gone, yet still accessible through our peculiar genius:
A genius of falsehood, of aggrandizement

But I'll choose pretty pleasures over drab reality;
I'll gently fold the delicate origami of my lampshade,
Tint the lighting to an amber glow,
And control the shadows

I'll give internal order to the ripping chaos outside.

Submitted on 2006-11-06 18:45:28 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
Hi Kristen,
“What a work is man!”, or something similar Shakespeare said. But the answer to your queries is: If God created man, no wonder he can turn piles of stones into glorious mountains. Of course, one could as easily view man alone as such a beauty-maker. In truth, your “evidence” proves nothing – doesn’t even add evidence for either position. Another answer: Insects, which can see into the ultraviolet range of light, often see flowers and leaves as far brighter and more glowing than we do. Does that prove there is no God? Or that there is a God? I think such evidence is irrelevant.
Now for the poem: The very first word should be eliminated. “There is” and “there are” usually weaken prose, and are usually unnecessary, as it this case. In fact, many of the words you use are excess baggage. An example of possible rewrites, using S1:
Such beauty expressed! / Everything questioned: / If indeed God is, how inferior! / See man’s improvement on nature!
This is just an example, one of many possible configurations, meant to demonstrate a principle. Your intent was thoughtful, a quality missing in many writes, but you do need to work a bit on compression. S5 is the best of the lot with its wonderful adjectives and imagery.
fred
| Posted on 2006-11-07 00:00:00 | by fredmelden | [ Reply to This ]
Oh no! She's found existentialism or something!

A great man also said that logic can only prove or disprove, and since logic cannot prove or disprove the existence of God, faith is beyond logic and must be based on something else; also, that some have the capability of having faith (through which they may make the infinite movements and produce finite effects, which are to them truth and to others a mystery) and that some do not. So I guess it's up to you to determine whether or not you can have faith... it's all in the intent. But remember: there is only one truth: God.

But who needs absolute truth? If truth is subjective, then is there a need for God? I don't think so, but I think it makes God's nature and existence subjective as well.

Anyway, on to your poem.

What I get from it: The romantization of the world around us (apart from the "truth" of what it is) may make us humans in fact more powerful than God, or at least brings God down to us, for we have the ability to access many possible interpretations and alterations of meaning and action: in short, the ability to shape our own worlds, to choose one reality over another, and to therefore come to terms with the world as we need it to be, rejecting God's "truth."

I have a question (or two) for you, though, and don't take it personal, I can't answer it.

Who gave us the ability to see all the romantic interpretations?

If reality is subjective, then the truth of that reality is subjective, and therefore is not truth. Is it not possible that God is God of all realities? Is it not possible that there are more possible realities and variations than we can imagine?

In the end, does the lack of absolute truth in the sum of all possibilities as humans can envision it point to God's weakness or his power? OR something else entriely?

Anyway, it's all just the echo of a shot at some shadows in a cave.
| Posted on 2006-11-07 00:00:00 | by lukewarm | [ Reply to This ]

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Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3 It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
It means a lot to them, as it does to you.