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    dots Submission Name: Circumlocutiondots

    Author: drowning_queen
    Elite Ratio:    5.44 - 245/270/52
    Words: 151
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1050
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1274

       It's meant to be wordy, that's the point.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    our apogee was much too high
    Brobdignagian at the zenith
    the daedal, plenary peaks
    now barely extant
    our comity shattered

    a congeries of premature surrender
    passes, cuggermugger, down the
    fractured channel that was -us-

    polyglot groupings chatter among ruins
    spreading rumors of our capitulation
    faceless automatons cant
    stringing false perspicacity
    around lissom, sagging branches
    of the decorticated core
    that we once layered
    prolix sentiments about

    our fomented partnership
    our extemporated life
    has subluxated suddenly
    at critical mass

    we've lost the quiddity
    that cynosure we emptied
    copious amounts of wasted
    sustenance into

    the epicenter of
    erroneous ventures
    we were too
    sightless to prevent

    our squandered prosperity
    has been defenestrated
    left to decay on truculent streets
    lugubrious in small dejected heaps

    we have surceased our meanings
    left only with loghrrea and persiflage
    vacuous but for vapid posturing
    and useless, non-sensical

    Submitted on 2006-11-09 14:29:43     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Damn, I had no idea what a lot of those words meant... I'd read a few and thought I knew some in their contexts, but others were... woosh... over my head lol.

    But as you said, that was the point. Ha.

    I liked your first and last strophes the most--they had the most crystal ideas and images to me.

    Yep. Very clever.


    | Posted on 2006-11-12 00:00:00 | by alteredlife | [ Reply to This ]
      I wondering if you meant cantations rather than cant, it seemed the brevity somehow conflicted. And then I even think the title could be

    Circumlocomotion because this didn't go anywhere but around in a circle, exactly as you suggested.

    But I like it in a strange and luxurious way, to be or not to be is not the question. It was and you were there. Love to love and mouth to mouth and elsewhere, who knows?

    Oh please don't take me seriously, my jest is only to leave a mark and footprint that I came and saw. Lovely and loquacious, lustable,
    lingering, lash of lip-ped fervor.


    | Posted on 2006-11-12 00:00:00 | by nansofast | [ Reply to This ]
      Yes, the ending did suit this piece. Pointless ramblings. Although it sounds more in the context of a relationship, what it really calls to mind for me is the current administration. Although...THE DEMOCRATS RETOOK BOTH HOUSES OF CONGRESS!! But back to the write. I had to whip out my trusty dictionary for about a quarter of the poem, which makes the reading a tad choppy. But that's merely because I haven't reached higher education. It's not my favorite of yours, but it makes a point. Speaking of nonsensical ramblings...

    | Posted on 2006-11-09 00:00:00 | by Melora | [ Reply to This ]

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