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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: zoom zoom zoomdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: rws
    ASL Info:    58/m/ohio
    Elite Ratio:    8 - 2779/1297/258
    Words: 67
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 641
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 524



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotszoom zoom zoomdots
    -------------------------------------------


    if you knew
    all this why
    didn't you tell me

    you may have tried
    in the same manner as
    wind slithers along
    flanks of chrome

    but the burnished blur
    of object and molten
    motion seemed

    perfectly suited
    to perpetual ease
    and I'd become

    motionless
    in the midst
    of motion

    I've never heard
    the road
    beg more

    am I forgiven





    Submitted on 2006-11-14 18:22:37     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
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    ||| Comments |||
      This makes me ask two questions. If who knew what? And forgiven for what? And that's where it leads me... the thought that this might be alluding to a traffic accident, or perhaps someone nearly running you over.

    "motionless
    in the midst
    of motion"
    --a stunned possum/rabbit/deer? About to eat chrome sandwich?

    Ha.

    Nicely done.

    Jase
    | Posted on 2006-11-14 00:00:00 | by alteredlife | [ Reply to This ]
      Nice feelings offered here to someone who has logged a lot of miles by both auto and motorcycle. It does look a little smooth without any punctuation or capitalization, kind of like a well molded street rod perhaps? I think that aspect works well here because of the auto allusion, although often it would not. Thanks.
    | Posted on 2006-11-14 00:00:00 | by Blue Monk | [ Reply to This ]


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