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    dots Submission Name: youdots

    Author: Thief
    ASL Info:    22/male/plainview
    Elite Ratio:    4.8 - 180/80/69
    Words: 188
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 567
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 949

       about a girl that fucked my heart up

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    you said you loved me
    i told you the same
    you gave me thoughts.
    i gave you another feeling
    you were weak as you laid on the floor
    i picked you up to protect you
    you desired what you could never grasp
    i offered you better things
    time passed us little by little
    but with you around i never noticed
    oh how you changed
    and i watched you in disgrace
    you gave in to Temptation
    but i was stupid to let you play your games
    life continues to piss me off
    so did you
    you let yourself be turned into a ho...
    i had no choice but to leave you
    eventually you got help
    but i couldnt forgive you
    you told again "i love you"
    i told you over agian "i love you too, babe"
    i think you only had word-no more than words
    my words had no meaning to hurt you

    Submitted on 2006-11-14 20:39:12     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      In your own words "So this is your first!"
    I liked these lines especially-
    "but with you around i never noticed
    oh how you changed"
    Not just with the situtation described in your poem, but in so many other relationship situations this holds true.
    You really dont notice how people change when your with them. Till on day, like a tidal wave, it crashes into you that this isn't the person you fell in love with.

    | Posted on 2010-09-18 00:00:00 | by girly101 | [ Reply to This ]
      This reminds me of a deuchbag I went out with.
    He told me he loved me and then left me for another girl.
    This is great though...Added.
    | Posted on 2006-12-02 00:00:00 | by xgirlxbassistx | [ Reply to This ]
      Yes, this poem is a good piece. Maybe a little raw on the words but I like the long lines. It's not exactly my genre but the idea is realistic enough as it is a personal life experience.
    | Posted on 2006-11-16 00:00:00 | by Porcelaine | [ Reply to This ]
    | Posted on 2006-11-14 00:00:00 | by Angemon | [ Reply to This ]
      nice, nice, keep up the good work on poetry and maybe you will get somewhere in life ;D
    | Posted on 2006-11-14 00:00:00 | by Angemon | [ Reply to This ]

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