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Six Seeds of Gloom

Author: Astarael
ASL Info:    19/Girl/Baltimore
Elite Ratio:    5.34 - 87 /102 /38
Words: 245
Class/Type: Poetry /Legend
Total Views: 881
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 1581


The story of Persephone is my favorite from Greek mythology.

Six Seeds of Gloom

Strands of sunlight die amongst the trees
I put on my coat to take my leave.
With frigid fingers I pry open the womb
Of earth to you in all your splendorous gloom.

Pressed in my palm I hold three fresh azaleas
Pale beside your purple doom regalia.
I crouch beside the shrine of glowing embers
And recall the melody of sweet December.

The river Stx is as long as it is cold.
Famished waters lapping at the holds
Of single ships passing through this way;
Deathless souls bound in dissarray.

Ceberus is waiting at the gate,
Drooling jaws to soon decide your fate.
Hades has you in his vice once more.
Golden throne upon the stony floor.

He procures a rounded glowing crimson fruit
And your freezing starving mind's not so astute.
Eating dripping drops of scarlet blood,
You kneel and cover sad eyes with your hood.

Watching you eat with dark infatuation
While you seek to decode your situation
Hades claims your beauty for his own.
Takes you as a prisoner in his home.

Demeter is screaming in her sleep.
The earth is barren; harvest can't be reaped.
With open eyes she listens to your moans.
Subterranean shrieks chilling to the bone.

Oh six you are but six that you are not
Indebted to the mire and the rot.
Shaking a trembling frame of internal strife
Half you are of death and half of life.

Submitted on 2006-11-15 21:39:35     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  A beautiful poem

Your use of language, is brilliant, I can really see what you are talking about, as if its a painting,

The metaphor is colorful, and the poem has meaning,

And the meaning trumps everything in the end, especially when written so well
| Posted on 2006-12-02 00:00:00 | by Static Scream | [ Reply to This ]
  The mythological story of persephone is indeed an interesting one. I read this story briefly and it is amazing to read greek mythology. Somehow i feel there is a message behind every greek story somehow.

anyhow, in this poem, i was only able to capture the story in the middle. The first three stanzas although it does seem as though it connects somehow, didn't really connect with me. I was only able to be connected with your poem after the third stanza.

This poem reminds me a lot of a greek mythological poem i once wrote (Pandora's Box). I doubted that many people even wrote about mythology anymore. Your poem was the first mythological poem that i have read in a really really long time.

Overall, i can't complain about this. Although you lost me in some areas, you did get the general idea of the story. Hope i see some more mythology soon. There are so many out there.
Take care....

| Posted on 2006-11-16 00:00:00 | by charmedidentity | [ Reply to This ]

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