[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Cliche'dots

    Author: Pastel Branches
    Elite Ratio:    2.78 - 1/1/1
    Words: 371
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 568
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2580


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Slip the clock
    wind moments up a staircase
    into tomorrow's light,
    from yesterday's past

    We were young;
    green to our love
    although this is only a dream
    forgotten and pushed down

    Yet also an ignored reality
    that lingers, pleasantly drifting
    like the scent of my orchids
    confined within the greenhouse,
    where a vibrant sensuality
    crept upon my tongue,
    that dripped like honey
    in tender sugared kiss

    His tongue slipped
    truth flew forth,
    graced air with words
    overused and cliché
    but never boring,
    the cherished treasure
    for a torn heart

    "I love you" he proclaimed,
    and stated that morning
    always comes too quickly

    He refused to open the shades,
    I darkened the shading
    upon my paper,
    and accidentally smeared charcoal
    in streaks across his face
    letting passion overwhelm

    I longed to lick him clean,
    imagined breathing life
    into the drawing
    of our every kiss
    to drift there, resting
    in his holds strength,
    with my head upon his chest
    absorbing the beat of life,
    that pounds the hum of love

    I thought about
    screaming out in confession

    "I am a poet!!
    ignore my silly giggles,
    I only pretend
    to be a normal girl
    with simple words"

    Silence stirred...
    or I could say:

    "My thoughts are painted images
    that grow vine-like,
    twisting, and churning
    a machine of wants,
    spilling out dedications,
    that I'm too shy for you to hear"

    But if I admitted,
    to being more,
    I would have standards,
    would have to be more
    in order to live up
    to high expectations

    Then poetry would wilt,
    the orchid's lavender hues
    soon would fade

    I'd have to produce
    for a reason;
    for his eyes to see,
    other than my insatiable need
    to ramble endlessly
    about heart's desires
    and needful pleas

    I giggled again,
    and just whispered,
    "I love you too"

    Could I have been
    any more cliché???

    Submitted on 2006-11-16 15:23:31     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Very beautifully written!

    "We were young;
    green to our love"
    This was a very simplistic, but very profound way to put it all the same. Very nicely put!

    I enjoyed this very much! Keep writing!

    | Posted on 2006-11-16 00:00:00 | by WinterInJuly | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Fasade written by jackz
    Carry written by saartha
    the living moment written by ShyOne
    Etiquette written by saartha
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    descent written by TheBadSadMan
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    Formal Jen written by Daniel Barlow
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    Silent Screams In Silent Dreams written by poetotoe
    Or are we written in the sand? written by Chelebel
    Every..... written by jackz
    a mood to be free written by Daniel Barlow
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (5) written by endlessgame23
    Cosmic Dreams written by Chelebel
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    World I No Longer Want written by ForgottenGraves
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    an unashamed poverty written by Daniel Barlow
    AI written by poetotoe
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (final) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    no words for how graceful you are in this moment written by Daniel Barlow




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]