I look at you,
perfect in every way,
i love you for you,
and the way,
you always listen,
to everything i have to say.
and i've waited,
for you for so long,
i wish you could stay forever.
but you are...
my last rolo,
and i'm afraid i must eat you now.
| Cool poem, Lou! You put such an unexpected end to it and I just couldn't help laughing on reading this! Very creative thinking...enjoyed reading this! Keep it up! : )||| Posted on 2007-03-29 00:00:00 | by mdsouza | [ Reply to This ] || HAHAHA.|
Completely unexpected ending, no I find nothing negative, you'll have to get me to stop laughing to start complaining about a missing comma or something.
It's wonderful how you turned one of those seemingly sappy love poems (even the title screams SAPPY LOVE POEM) into something amusing.
Keep it up!
|| Posted on 2007-02-26 00:00:00 | by Azuire | [ Reply to This ] || Ha. Ha. Hahaha. Ha. |
Why do I always seem to start my letters off like that? I need to get a new byline.
Anywho, I started out confused as to whether it was comedy or not...then I hit the ending. Interesting...Very interesting... Have you considered seeing a therapist about this odd...affair you've been having with your food?
|| Posted on 2006-12-11 00:00:00 | by crimson echo | [ Reply to This ] || hah you had me going for a minute there..very clever. |
|| Posted on 2006-12-04 00:00:00 | by 777sacrites777 | [ Reply to This ] || Loved it...would have bet my life that it was another teen love poem--well, perhaps, it was, though a VERY different one to be sure!---totally unexpeced ending...a really neat and nifty poem...Bravo!!! Loved it!||| Posted on 2006-11-21 00:00:00 | by Algol46 | [ Reply to This ] || haha, this is fantastic!! i was all ready to go 'aww, she's in love'.. |
way to go..this had me laffin'!!
and i love rolo's too!!
|| Posted on 2006-11-19 00:00:00 | by whirl | [ Reply to This ] || Oh God, Louise! But, if ya gotta go, what a delicious way to die; to be eaten by a desiring lovely lady! That Rolo must have ascended to "Rolo Heaven"!!!||| Posted on 2006-11-18 00:00:00 | by Ron Cole | [ Reply to This ] || Yum just about sums this up.||| Posted on 2006-11-18 00:00:00 | by Ygi | [ Reply to This ] || This had me going at first, I tohught it was going to be a sappy love poem, but it turned out funny. Nice job... I don't really have anything negitive to say, sorry, maybe next time. Sorry for your loss though, hope you get more rolos soon. lol Keep up the nice work, and I'll keep reading.|
|| Posted on 2006-11-18 00:00:00 | by skullreaperX_X | [ Reply to This ] |