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Thunder


Author: Kasper187
ASL Info:    24 m Texas
Elite Ratio:    2.03 - 71 /64 /43
Words: 167
Class/Type: Poetry /Serious
Total Views: 795
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 935



Description:




Thunder



Into the night I find the rain
Take me away from this bleeding pain
Show me how to smile once again
This search inside will never end

What I thought was so real
Was only just in my dreams
Every lie spoken darkens the pain
Can you feel me screaming

You and loneliness seem always there
Surrounding light of a darkened pain
Why do you ask and what can you say
Forget your lies and deal with this pain

Can you see the sadness in my eyes
I sit back and watch my heart break
Can you feel the Thunder in my cries
Lost in pain and so much hate

Into the night I find the rain
Take me away from this bleeding pain
Show me how to love once again
This search inside will never end...

© ©2006 Anthony Paul Garcia/
-SorrowsNomdeplume




Submitted on 2006-11-20 16:37:49     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  "Can you feel me screaming"

did you mean "Can you hear me screaming"?
i think that makes sense more
| Posted on 2006-11-21 00:00:00 | by Ani | [ Reply to This ]
  this was a very good poem. i can feel the pain you put into this piece. it hurts when you can no longer trust the one with your heart and found your relationship based on a lie. the only thing you want to do is die and then one day you wake up and it's all over and you can smile again. trust me you do get there it just takes a while. joanna
| Posted on 2006-11-20 00:00:00 | by heartless_ | [ Reply to This ]
  That's good. It's kind of eerie, but I like it. I like your choice of words, as for the can u feel me screaming part, I think you should keep it "feel" not hear-it leaves more of an impression
| Posted on 2006-12-04 00:00:00 | by iKnowWhoIAmNow | [ Reply to This ]


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