I want to cry out to you,
but you're not there.
And I don't know who "you" are anyway,
so I'll just pretend not to care.
But this uncaring way suits me little.
I wear my heart around my neck like a tie.
And oh, how it drags me down!
I am bound up tight with threads I cannot break,
Enticed to make promises I should not make.
It is hard to admit your life is built on a lie!
All of my imagined lovers,
And even my conjectured haters-
They are all anticipated.
(I reached out for what was closest
When I should have waited.)
But I know what I've lived;
I live out what I've seen,
And what I've seen are broken dreams;
Broken hopes threaded through worn-out seams,
Tattered thoughts expressed in torn blue jeans.
Blue lives laced with a shade of gray,
Gray lives longing to be okay.
Insanity wrought by thoughts unexpressed,
Caged minds waiting to be undressed.
When all facades are stripped away and lying on the floor,
I stand facing you naked but I still want more.
I long for peace among my thoughts on a sultry summer day.
I long for comfort and safety in the full sense of the way.
I long for just one tangible something,
and reach out in every direction,
but I still feel....