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    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Shedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lauren hamill
    ASL Info:    24/f/can't say really.
    Elite Ratio:    3.51 - 52/30/14
    Words: 173
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 913
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1429



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsShedots
    -------------------------------------------


    She is everything
    you are not.
    She is beauty,
    Defined beauty.

    She walks with grace,
    Confidence and poise.
    Her curves are something
    to gawk at.

    Her legs are
    long branches
    upon which
    the perfect clam is perched.

    They all look at her
    lips licked with
    their snake like
    tongues.

    She saunters around
    skirt up to there
    top down to here
    yet her sexuality

    is not on
    you hate
    rather one
    you want.

    She'll look at me
    she'll smile
    she'll know me
    she was me

    once.

    Sex is something
    i am not.
    Sex screams,
    sex sells.
    sex rapes,
    pillages,
    seduces,
    with it's charms.

    For, I was her once.
    The untouchable
    beauty folded into
    her body.

    Fabulous features
    forlorned, pouty eyes
    sadness filled
    cradled in with still

    ness. breathes at me.
    gawks at me.
    haunts my skin.
    licking their lips.
    shadows dance.
    on the ceiling as
    my head falls back
    in ecstasy.

    she cries.






    Submitted on 2006-11-21 22:28:42     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      it seems that you have changed your life around from a girl that used to put it all out there? but the ending kind of changed that... i love the beginning but the ending gets confusing
    Katana
    | Posted on 2006-11-30 00:00:00 | by Katana Ryoko | [ Reply to This ]
      yeah, the spacing of the lines was not intentional on this. i did it by accident, and i'm not sure how to fix it now. so, sorry!
    | Posted on 2006-11-24 00:00:00 | by lauren hamill | [ Reply to This ]
      A very introspective and slightly mysterious piece about lost innocence (?) very well put together, with a fine use of short lines, bare bones and very much to the point most of the time...in my very humble opinion as fine as this poem is it would be even beter if you single spaced the lines rather than double spacing...bravo!
    | Posted on 2006-11-22 00:00:00 | by Algol46 | [ Reply to This ]


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