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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Mixed emotions...dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: psyko
    Elite Ratio:    3.5 - 376/168/66
    Words: 535
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 889
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2870



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMixed emotions...dots
    -------------------------------------------


    Love has an energy,
    too powerful for most.
    Love is that pain I feel,
    when I can't hold her close.
    Love is that block in my throat,
    when I hear her name.
    When love hits someone,
    they'll never be the same.

    It's the thought held behind a rose,
    meant to brighten her day.
    It's the need to make her happy,
    somehow; someway
    It's the force that keeps me moving,
    when others fall.
    Even all of these words,
    can't describe love at all.

    It's the yearn to be around her,
    it always drives me nuts.
    But everytime I feel her body,
    I become such a clutz.
    A coolness fills my soul,
    when I look into her eyes.
    Love is my need for her,
    it's immeasurable the size.

    Love is what always makes me,
    second guess myself.
    Love is not an object,
    to be put atop a shelf.
    Love will make one cry,
    tears of pain; tears of joy.
    Love hits everyone just as hard,
    whether you're a girl or a boy.

    Love makes me worry,
    "Am I doing something wrong?"
    Love is when I go someplace,
    and I want her to come along.
    Love is when she's in my arms,
    and my whole body goes weak.
    Love is when we sit together,
    and it's our eyes from which we speak.

    Love is when I see her uneasiness,
    and I long to make it better.
    Love is a form of life,
    It makes you crazy; it lasts forever.
    It's like the time I close my eyes,
    and she's smiling in my sight.
    It's the way I fell around her,
    how all the wrongs are made so right.

    Yet, none of lines,
    describe exactly how I feel.
    My love for her is painful,
    but it's pleasure is near unreal.
    It causes the emotional confusion,
    that rips me all apart.
    I know I love her dearly,
    not in mind, but of my heart.

    Because every line I feel,
    for just one single girl.
    She came into my life one day,
    and suddenly changed my world.
    I'm afraid to tell her this,
    for she may think it lame.
    But it kills me sit and wonder,
    "Does she fell the same?"

    She's a literal wish come true,
    for me to feel complete.
    It's hard for me to think about her,
    for my heart still skips it's beat.
    And still I feel such at loss,
    when she's nowhere next to me.
    I know I love her deeply,
    but does she feel it for me?





    Submitted on 2006-11-22 23:10:10     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This is a gorgeous poem. It was on the long side, but it kept my attention from the first line to the last. You beautifully tell that you can only explain a certain amount of what love does to someone. The rhyme scheme makes this flow wonderfully. Great Job.

    Kaitlyn.
    | Posted on 2006-12-01 00:00:00 | by numbertwenty | [ Reply to This ]
      I don't usually read or enjoy reading (or writing) love poetry. However the title caught my eye.
    It flows quite well, the rhyme is enjoyable, and the point is very simple and easy to catch for people who can't or won't read between the lines. The only possible comment I would have is that it's considerably longer than your other stuff.
    Cheers
    Azuire
    | Posted on 2006-11-23 00:00:00 | by Azuire | [ Reply to This ]
      this is stunning. the pleasure-pain of love.
    you have hit the nail on the head with this, it explains all the emotions so perfectly.
    kinda strange, finding something like this amongst your other stuff...
    | Posted on 2006-11-23 00:00:00 | by whirl | [ Reply to This ]
      This is just bittersweet! You truly travel through a map of love as though a new-aged Columbus wanting to pinpoint each discovery to his own liking. It's very personal and intimate in a suttle sort of way, but I just love how you define "love" in all situations, whether that be by questioning it or redefining it...it's all a struggle that you must conquer.

    The ending surprised me a little bit, yet it made me smile. Usually I don't like it when a poem ends with a question only because I'm such a nervous type of person that I would be like "omg answer me! Don't hang up!" lol, but I liked this because it made me realize that this poem is the love inside of YOU. The focus was on your feelings when love is usually shared, so this was an interesting take to ask whether this person that intrigues you so much actually loves you or not (at least loves you the way you do in order to reciprocate).

    It rhymes lol, so that's cool too! I am horrible at rhyming for some reason so hey this poem was a bonus at the same time. Ah love....it takes you beyond our sacred limits doesn't it? Ah, you shall find me floating to your next poem soon...

    ~darkrose16
    | Posted on 2006-11-23 00:00:00 | by darkrose16 | [ Reply to This ]
      It's beautiful. There isn't much more to say.
    | Posted on 2006-11-23 00:00:00 | by Desolate_beauty | [ Reply to This ]
      Well that was LONG. But I found it to be great. Even though I don't read love poems much, this Is a very good piece considering the effort, the rhyme, the flow and even certain expressions. For a man with cold emotions (as you yourself had said it) you still have a subtle way of making the warm ones beautiful.
    | Posted on 2006-11-23 00:00:00 | by Porcelaine | [ Reply to This ]
      Thisis amazing.. Beautiful and stunning, I was crying before i read this and now im crying harder.. Love is a wonderful thing but it hurts worse than anything else on this earth at times... great write very long but perfect...

    ~ Love Rachel
    | Posted on 2006-11-23 00:00:00 | by Bloody_Rain | [ Reply to This ]


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