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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Love's Graspdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Morilla
    ASL Info:    16/F/Somewhere
    Elite Ratio:    4.3 - 10/8/9
    Words: 117
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 132
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 708



    Description:
       It's a sonnet I wrote for English class... typical Shakespearean form. And very soppy too! :P
    Written some time at the beginning of 2006?


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLove's Graspdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Love’s grasp is the strongest bond never broke,
    Never to be forgot in a world where
    One thing said will mean another. We choke,
    Choke on things we do not mean. But love’s there.
    A rose cannot compare to love, pure love.
    Pure love will not wither and die with time.
    Love’s pure essence will not fade. Like a dove
    Love flies high over, forever, in rhyme.
    In perfect harmony love will reign on.
    All obstacles are mere speckles of dust.
    Nothing will make love falter and weaken.
    In love’s wake all will shatter. Love, not lust.
    Do not pass love for love unless love’s true.
    Just know that true love is found within you.




    Submitted on 2006-11-24 14:53:41     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Very nice. I am a sucker for poetry with form. In a post-Whitman world it is nice to see people try to write within some boundaries. It is considerably harder, but when done well, packs more of a punch. Maybe change line 9 to someting like: In perfect harmony, love is a beacon or love beckons; just to keep all your rhymes working. Elsewise, good job. A sonnets power lies in the last rhymed couplet and I believe you nailed it. Good write.
    | Posted on 2006-11-28 00:00:00 | by Scribner | [ Reply to This ]
      this wasnt bad. im not an expert on sonnets, but what does weaken rhyme with? i couldnt quite catch that. and the rhythm seemed a little wonky to me in some places. but maybe ive just been inhaling too much incense. like you said, a little sappy, but thats love for ya. anyway, keep rocking.

    i tip my hat and bid thee farewell.
    | Posted on 2006-11-24 00:00:00 | by PoeticNonsense | [ Reply to This ]



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    January 10 07
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