[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Follow me.dots

    Author: kellz
    ASL Info:    25/F/England
    Elite Ratio:    2.95 - 123/152/52
    Words: 118
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 982
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 673

       just something i wrote when i was with one of my exboyfriends he loved it and he added the last 2

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsFollow me.dots

    Oh how i long to touch my lips
    on yours and just to think
    we would have been surprised if
    even a thought crossed our
    minds but today
    we lay here in sweet delight as
    hours of passion pass us by.
    But one question still remains do
    you love me enough to
    follow me and listen to
    stories being told.
    Will you come with me and see
    that love changes but never
    grows old.
    And then if you drop me the same
    question i will speak
    and i will say,
    "I will follow you to the end
    of the earth and that i promise you, my love."

    Submitted on 2004-05-30 04:44:24     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Kind of a stretch going from yesterday not even having the thought of kissing cross your minds to loving each other eternally, but either way there was some very nice places in this piece, especially in the beginning...there just seems as though you skipped over a transition somewhere from friends to forever...?
    | Posted on 2004-06-03 00:00:00 | by Emerging Soul | [ Reply to This ]
      somethin of true love that even I would quiver at the thought of it. its really nice to read this once in a while though I try not to. hmmmmmmmm this would be nice if your edited it a bit and use it as your voul (spelling, I can never get it right lol. voul as in marriage vouls. spelling errors again...) your explanations of a simple act of loving and staying together forever is really good, jsut some misplaced words here and there. I like it.
    | Posted on 2004-05-30 00:00:00 | by BloodChildVagueSoul | [ Reply to This ]
      This is really a beautiful poem. I'm not surpirised he loved it, I only wish my love would write my something, sigh...Anyway, this has a really good flow to it and the message is very touching. Great write!
    | Posted on 2004-05-30 00:00:00 | by JimweiZERO | [ Reply to This ]
      'love changes but never
    grows old' is so beautiful, words everybody would do well to remember. dropme should be corrected but other than that this is very good and your flow is great...very lovey dovey *sniff*
    | Posted on 2004-05-30 00:00:00 | by pyrestarter | [ Reply to This ]
      thanks for your comment on follow me i am glad you like it although it did not take me long that one line "that love changes but never
    grows old."
    took me ages to think of
    | Posted on 2004-05-30 00:00:00 | by kellz | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    To written by SavedDragon
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    This written by Chelebel
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Break Up written by WriteSomething
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Bond written by saartha
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    Summer written by layDsayD
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]