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An Eagle rising

Author: Static Scream
ASL Info:    17/m/Russian(in Mid East)
Elite Ratio:    6.81 - 14 /6 /10
Words: 114
Class/Type: Poetry /Misc
Total Views: 774
Average Vote:    5.0000
Bytes: 546


Just two stanzas, after that I figured, theres nothing I can add

The eagle represents the soul (Egyptian mythology)

An Eagle rising

Beyond the hills I see a fire
The smoke is lifting to the skies
The ash blows from a funeral pyre
A shadow in disguise
And crimson rays, across the sky
Like blood red tears crawling by

Illuminate, the starlines.
A wind is blowing from the West
It perches on a mountain crest
And looks upon an eagle fly
Up with the smoke, out of the fire
To trace a spiral in the sky
Towards the light it holds so dire

Submitted on 2006-11-29 01:37:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!


  the atmosphere is alive. the sun is shedding tears and the wind is eagerly watching an eagle (note the pun. hoho). and the eagle has this spiritual aspect. or perhaps its sort of a fire. i feel that your title "an eagle rising" requires you fulfill its story. hmm you repeat the words smoke and fire... why i wonder? way to paint an image. the eagle is fizzling inside my mind.
| Posted on 2006-12-02 00:00:00 | by Jack Pearson | [ Reply to This ]
  This is really beautiful, and very visual. I just wish it were longer, but that's up to you. It just sort of seems like a kind of story, and I'd like to see more of it.
| Posted on 2006-12-01 00:00:00 | by Venia | [ Reply to This ]
  A perfect imagery, insatiable dark is a reign I find this poem to belong to. The atmosphere is, as I'm sure you intended, a foreboding mystique. I see you used mythology! That is also one of the things I hold high and appreciate. i think you have talent. Please keep up with writing.
| Posted on 2006-11-30 00:00:00 | by Porcelaine | [ Reply to This ]
  I really like this... it's an observation of nature... simple and plain but i cant help but think theres a hidden meaning to it that i'm missing...
| Posted on 2006-11-30 00:00:00 | by Katana Ryoko | [ Reply to This ]
  i like it, it does seem like an obervation poem, but well writtne. good write
| Posted on 2006-11-29 00:00:00 | by nipole | [ Reply to This ]
  I really like this poem, especially the frist stanza...poetically it is quite excellent....fine use of rhyme and meter...overall very finely is, pehaps too short....but this is not really a criticisim, rather just an observation...again, very well done...bravo...bravo...
| Posted on 2006-11-29 00:00:00 | by Algol46 | [ Reply to This ]

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