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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Today...dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: bleeding_sin
    ASL Info:    16/F/OR
    Elite Ratio:    3.03 - 54/68/57
    Words: 188
    Class/Type: Poetry/Death
    Total Views: 558
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1040



    Description:
       What can kill me. That will consusme me and m friend.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsToday...dots
    -------------------------------------------


    Today...
    I ment a guy he is so sweet.If only I could touch him.
    Today...
    I walked in the snow. It was beautifully whitre in the distance.
    Today....
    I tryed not to eat. BUt then Iam just a copier.

    Toady...
    I can't be myself. ONly to one person who dosen't even really know me.
    Toady...
    I cut made new scars. Did over the faded one's.
    Toady...
    I cryed tears of a broken heart. ANd the pain it bared.

    Toady...
    My best friend dyed. She died of bullimia.
    Today...
    I died. I pulled a trigger and took some pills. Just to kill.
    Today...
    I really died. From anorexia.

    Today...
    Was my funeral. IT was pretty. People came and cryed.
    Today...
    I will rest in my grave. All because I didn't want to eat.
    Toady...
    I died from anorexia and my friend bullimia

    Today...
    I will lye in the ground




    Submitted on 2006-11-30 21:10:06     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    ||| Comments |||
      This poem is sad. Very sad. I like the way it was put together. I don't know about the first stanza tho. It really doesn't go with the rest of the poem. But I liked it :)


    XoXo,

    }i{Renae}i{
    | Posted on 2006-12-01 00:00:00 | by Poetic_tragedy6 | [ Reply to This ]
      i like the set up,its good and organized,has rythm and flow,matbe add some rhymeing...

    ur pic is really graphic,i was a hair from not reading the poem cause that made me wat to thro up!
    if u want us to see it paint the picture with ur words,put it in a poem.
    | Posted on 2006-12-01 00:00:00 | by girly101 | [ Reply to This ]
      Haunting. Yes very haunting.
    Were the spelling errors on purpose?
    Cheers
    Azuire
    | Posted on 2006-12-01 00:00:00 | by Azuire | [ Reply to This ]
      theres quite a few grammatical errors in here.
    also i like the idea of the repetition of today but i think each stanza should have some common theme. it seems like everything is just really randomly shoved into this poem
    | Posted on 2006-11-30 00:00:00 | by Roula | [ Reply to This ]


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