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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Eyes of Envydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Aracid
    ASL Info:    19/F/Florida
    Elite Ratio:    3.94 - 6/2/3
    Words: 173
    Class/Type: Poetry/Gothic
    Total Views: 185
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 933



    Description:
       The dark vampire abomination envies her, but he doesn't know why.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsEyes of Envydots
    -------------------------------------------


    Her face is beautiful, I hate it so.
    My soul is at war of which I should repent or sin,
    Indeed I tear the feathered wings from her fragile skin,
    In the midths I consume her blood and leave her soul at woe.

    With no regret I drag her limp body to the deepest depths below,
    To much dismay she has done nothing to deserve this pain from bodily to within,
    She is not a murderer, nor a theif, nor a vixen.
    With no struggle I can fight these urges, but hate is all I know.

    Child of God blood tears you cry,
    Weep forever, I shall not release you from this pain.
    I'll wither your flesh until there is not a drop of blood left to give.

    You shall never again be one with the sea nor the sky,
    No will, no reason, nor hope spared to keep you sane.
    Yet you leave my mind in wonder, why is it you still fight to live?




    Submitted on 2006-12-01 19:09:27     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I think you should space the lines a bit more, the long, drown-out lines get annoying to follow. For example, try doing something like this:

    With no regret I drag her limp body
    to the deepest depths below,
    To much dismay she has done nothing
    to deserve this pain from bodily to within,
    She is not a murderer, nor a theif, nor a vixen.
    With no struggle I can fight these urges
    but hate is all I know.
    | Posted on 2006-12-02 00:00:00 | by Two Meters Away | [ Reply to This ]
      i love the way youre so descriptive with your concept. i really enjoyed this piece, and its a new favorite. welcome to es
    | Posted on 2006-12-01 00:00:00 | by kase | [ Reply to This ]
      wow i like that , nice picture too. so dark , i like...
    | Posted on 2006-12-01 00:00:00 | by Kasper187 | [ Reply to This ]



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