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    dots Submission Name: firefliesdots

    Author: lauren hamill
    ASL Info:    24/f/can't say really.
    Elite Ratio:    3.51 - 52/30/14
    Words: 193
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 688
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1325

       about words and poetry.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Fireflies sealed between
    My lips, desperately trying
    To flee, and free the
    Feelings dimly lit.

    Buzzing around my mouth
    I hum their tune out loud
    Beating wings against my tongue
    It is hard for me to let them go.

    Once I do,
    They won’t be mine,
    Coming to me in fast-moving dreams
    Ones where all the frames make sense
    Separately, but together they’re a mess.

    They lay eggs between my teeth.
    They hatch and give life to me
    They give birth to the most beautiful words
    Kept in the darkness of this depth.

    (for what is a poet without speech)?

    Finally the buzzing got too loud,
    The fluttering too heavy to bear,
    And I opened my mouth with
    The most deliberate exhale.

    Worlds were born from me,
    Lives created before my eyes
    The sound was deafening like
    Bull frogs in the night.

    Flying so freely,
    Swirling streams of light,
    Their beauty was never-ending,
    carried restlessly on their wings

    (for they were truths and sorrows)!

    Lies for tomorrow,
    Honesty from yesterday.
    They were what was
    and will be what may.

    Submitted on 2006-12-05 14:17:30     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Well, isn't this a surprise, I had all but given up hope of finding some piece of original poetry on this site. Lately, I have read to many emo little kid poems. This was a nice change. Thank you. You have done me a service with your words. From one to another...this was a relief.

    | Posted on 2006-12-06 00:00:00 | by lori_tab | [ Reply to This ]
      This is very original and creative. I don't believe I've ever read a poem of a similar thematic especially not with this kind of descriptive style. It has practicly all the senses awake: the sight of course because the imagery here is quite vivid along with the colors and atmosphere; the smell because rennaissance (the rebirth) is often directly in symbolistic unity with spring and so I instantly remembered the smell of spring even though Croatia is in for a deep winter; there is also taste although a little abstract kind of taste because it's the taste of words; and finally the sound - the buzzing, a living nature even though it may be metaphorical. What's an amateur poet like me to do but to relate? Stunning piece!
    | Posted on 2006-12-06 00:00:00 | by Porcelaine | [ Reply to This ]
      Nice imagery here. Lots of movement flows from this poem. I like the firefly concept,(especially in the teeth and mouth, you can almost taste it) that words live and breed, bare light, create etc. I love using natures beasts and creatures in my work too. Sometimes I don't even try to, it just comes out. Really cool work here
    | Posted on 2006-12-05 00:00:00 | by Ratmeat | [ Reply to This ]

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