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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Amoebadots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: vitoko
    ASL Info:    24/M
    Elite Ratio:    4.4 - 690/442/104
    Words: 110
    Class/Type: Prose/Love
    Total Views: 889
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 653



    Description:
       well read it .. and what you think please


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAmoebadots
    -------------------------------------------



    Oh love, your flight broke my legs
    This insipid taste which emerge of my lips
    Is poisoning my soul, i am devastated...
    Defeated, wishing i could walk, but dont even crawl
    My ideas are so vague, I lost my identity

    I despise myself while looking to the mirror
    I vomit to myself , i am so alone.
    Every move of you corner me.
    I need your oxygen...
    I should be reborn!!!

    Look for the way out between my skin.
    Every scar is a breath, every wound is “I am sorry”.
    Framed and throw-away
    How disgusting is being mortal damned to die..




    Submitted on 2006-12-06 11:09:56     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Great premise and opening, but stumbles a little. You might be amused to think that since one ameoba just splits into two, two into four and so on, if you think about it it doesn't seem that any one would ever actually die, they just keep splitting and going. Immortal. It's just not fair, here with us being so "evolved" and all.
    | Posted on 2007-09-15 00:00:00 | by Blue Monk | [ Reply to This ]
      Very graphic indeed. Hm...I do think that is raw, and hot, and like here. However, I do not see how it fits into the 'love' category...I find that this is prose--very straight-forward and unique.

    Me likey. ^_^
    | Posted on 2006-12-14 00:00:00 | by Twisted | [ Reply to This ]
      oh my..... wow that is sick and graphic and wonderful. it's really raw , i might go back and look it over again once things cool down
    | Posted on 2006-12-06 00:00:00 | by in shadow | [ Reply to This ]


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