Understanding and believing in friends

Author: Lover girl ASL Info:    17, female Elite Ratio:    4.39 - 83 /54 /24 Words: 101

Class/Type: Poetry /Friendship Total Views: 1017 Average Vote:    No vote yet. Bytes: 609

Description:

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Understanding and believing in friends

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I know now, I understand You never wanted to be my man You were a good lier You made me believe "Puppy love" you said to me Was all you thought we were I think you were right Though so piercing the words I hope with my heart I believe with my soul Our friendship will last Until our bodies are old You seem happy and so content Treat her well along with your self Be true to your heart Though it may bend and break All things mend And we will be happy So be a good friend

Submitted on 2006-12-06 15:27:18     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments

Well, I don't have a whole lot to say about this because it is quite straight forward and there's no questions about what you wanted the reader to get out of it. So I guess in that way it's pretty good. From what I have seen from you, it's not your best - but I'm not sure what you could do to make it your best..Maybe I'm just being grumpy.... Anyway, I mostly just wanted to let you know that your spelling of 'liar' should probably be changed. (*you spelled it 'lier'.) I hope you don't take it the wrong way; spelling isn't anything really when it comes to the overall rating of poetry, but sometimes it does distract the reader enough to change an opinion somewhat - so I thought you'd want to know... Good job.

| Posted on 2007-01-18 00:00:00 | by stefhy | [ Reply to This ]

This was well written and put together. I can't really find anything wrong with it. Nicely done. It portrayed hurt and sorrow, but also love and hope. The point set very finely, and it flowed magnificently. I love it! Keep up the awesome work, and I'll keep reading. Saint Razor

| Posted on 2006-12-06 00:00:00 | by brknprlcndol | [ Reply to This ]

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