Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Heroes 2.0dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Akili
    Elite Ratio:    2.36 - 915/400/60
    Words: 260
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 701
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1669



    Description:
       I desided to re-do another poem of mine. I think the first one's a little bit better though, I'd like to have what people have to say it though ^_^


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsHeroes 2.0dots
    -------------------------------------------



    Heroes have come to save you and me
    From sins great and small
    Greed, bank robbers, envy, and kingpins
    All must take a fall.

    Heroes have come to save us
    With powers and feelings of right
    With skin of steel and legs of fire
    Eyes that always are watching at night
    So we can go and play our games
    They swoop down in order to fight

    Did Batman ever die
    With a last sigh on his lips?
    Blood soaked and angry
    As it had been someone’s wish

    Superman still lies alone
    Eyes searching everyone
    Who can save loneness
    One day, would he fall?
    Would it be at night
    In some dark alleyway
    Would the papers care to ask
    What was the hooker’s name?

    Heroes have come here for us
    Help to learn what’s best
    Live to help, live to save
    Never go against an American way.


    Justice is always right
    That’s what everyone says
    Watch the sky
    For another to deliver it.
    And when our her is bleeding alone
    In a crowd of millions
    Will someone every say
    “you don’t have to die for me
    I’ll handle this one.”?

    Made of steel and little bugs
    One’s life can never be the same
    Why is life never easy
    And what can one do
    When only the villains really know you?

    Heroes have come to save us all
    Help our hopes, kill our sins
    They’ve never cried
    Never made judgment or lied
    Who’s there to tell them
    It’s going to be alright?




    Submitted on 2006-12-07 10:47:40     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      ok, i've never read anything by you and this is my first.
    so, to me this is pretty unique and i like it.
    some things throughout the poem lost me and i got bored and some i was really into.
    i do like the story and messege it was saying through the whole thing, and the ending just topped it off and made it perfect.


    <bleedingtears>
    | Posted on 2006-12-10 00:00:00 | by BleedingTears | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    127770

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Shut Up written by annie0888
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    Carry written by saartha
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    Dream written by closetpoet
    I, Plutarch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Shi written by ShyOne
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    untitled written by ShyOne
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (1) written by endlessgame23
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    Cover written by saartha
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Love written by saartha
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    prison written by ShyOne
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry