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    dots Submission Name: build me like a citydots

    Author: lauren hamill
    ASL Info:    24/f/can't say really.
    Elite Ratio:    3.51 - 52/30/14
    Words: 156
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 774
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1120

       playing with this idea. not sure how it works. i need some time to mull it all over. thought i'd post for the idea. it ends a bit abrupty to me, considering how long it is. but, no fear! i will think of something to make it what i want.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsbuild me like a citydots

    Mow my lawn
    Make me pretty
    Build me up
    Like a city.

    Install windows
    Where it was dark
    Build a door
    Straight to my heart.

    Cut my hair
    Make me modern.
    Construct a statue
    Dedicated to us.

    Paint my walls
    The color of you.
    Make a seat
    Where it was empty.

    Sculpt me round,
    Cover me up
    Make of me
    what you want.

    For I am made
    of clay.
    And dirt,
    brick and plaster.

    Yet, I am
    To your

    Change my shape.
    Bulldoze me
    Over, knock me
    Down, build me up.

    When you leave
    I may crumble
    and my exterior
    may fade.

    But, Beauty is

    My foundation
    is filled
    With context,
    not content.

    You are a
    A science of aesthetics.
    but, I am an expert
    Of semantics.

    Submitted on 2006-12-11 11:45:43     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      This is very well versed and ties together well the want, discovery and realisation of your true inner being.
    Really quite moving and from a simplistic sense, (that's very cool in my book).

    It's a great companion for my own poem of a similar theme of discovery and realisation.
    | Posted on 2006-12-18 00:00:00 | by danativ | [ Reply to This ]
      i love it. What I like about it is how in the beginning it sounds like you just want material possessions, or a makeover, and then you realize u dont need it, because when its all over you will be strong on your own. Nice succint phrases, easy to understand with a deeper depth, its awesome.
    | Posted on 2006-12-11 00:00:00 | by blankscreen | [ Reply to This ]

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