Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Through A Clouddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Liv2LoveThePain
    ASL Info:    19 - F - Philly
    Elite Ratio:    4.23 - 1527/1515/256
    Words: 181
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 1058
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 1315



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThrough A Clouddots
    -------------------------------------------


    There's nobody to play with me.
    Goodbye, Sunshine. It's time
    to walk the path of nothingness
    that you once said is mine.
    The soul in the mirror
    of a face long gone
    knows the words, loves the song,
    but fails to sing along.
    Lover of "The Patients"
    ("victims," as they're known)
    finally gives up on them,
    but never calls them home.
    Lyrics of the lost
    repeat slowly at night,
    shadowing
    perverse delight
    on self-inflicted fights.
    You're crying through a cloud,
    waiting for the day
    a hero comes
    (though undone)
    to take it all away.
    Silence reigns
    (again)
    this kingdom of The End,
    and no one gets the postcards
    you so often send.
    I said good-bye to love
    to suffocate romance.
    It's all the same,
    so in the flames,
    I'll close my eyes and dance.
    Put roses on my pillow
    without a second glance.
    Maybe if it's all a dream,
    we'll get that one last chance.
    With your lighter to the stars,
    the moon falls in the sea.
    I'd walk that path
    to hear you laugh,
    'cause part of you is me.




    Submitted on 2006-12-11 15:02:54     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This was soooo amazing but it was sad. Seriously, why are you so talented? not fair. Oh well, cant have it all. anyway, i think this is one of my favorites. I'm sad but it was worth it.
    | Posted on 2006-12-20 00:00:00 | by LoveToHateMe | [ Reply to This ]
      an incredible piece! i think it could be a song.. ^_^
    my favorite part was about the moon falling into the sea... cuz i love the moon.. and the sea :P
    it was neat the way the lines were started to give the poem thing more meaning to the singled out word or phrase
    did that make sense? O.o? ^_^
    your works are so amazing
    i'm excited to read more!
    | Posted on 2006-12-13 00:00:00 | by LoneWolf | [ Reply to This ]
      I liked this so much! It had so much feeling in it!!! Great write!
    Kelley Frost
    | Posted on 2006-12-11 00:00:00 | by whendt | [ Reply to This ]
      What are you trying to say?

    It flows really well, and the lines are catchy, very catchy, but i don't really get it. Let me know.
    | Posted on 2006-12-20 00:00:00 | by UnspokenDreamer | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    128346

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    The Abyss of Love written by poetotoe
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    no sky on the other side written by teika5
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    The World written by jjd
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry