I Was Reminded. by kellz

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Submission Name: I Was Reminded. dots

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Author:	kellz
ASL Info:	25/F/England
Elite Ratio:	2.97 - 122/148/49
Words:	147

Class/Type:	Poetry/Misc
Total Views:	410
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	869

Description:
just memories of ex lovers and how i feel after break ups

I Was Reminded. dots

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I Was Reminded
As we lay there quiet
I was reminded of all the reasons why I lust you
Your smile,
and the way it teased at me seductively
Your laugh,
and the way it tempted me
Your eyes,
and the way they seem to hypnotize me

As we sat there silent
I was reminded of all the reasons why I love you
Your smile,
and the way it brings such life into me
Your laugh,
and the way it makes everything okay
Your eyes,
and the way them seems to read my thoughts

As we stand there talking
I am reminded of all the reasons why I hate you
Your smile,
and the way it confuses me
Your laugh,
and the way it seems to mock me
Your eyes,
and the way they can look into mine and not feel a thing

Submitted on 2004-06-01 09:44:52 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
  smacjectives.
its fine ,iunderstand the piece.
the lies we tell ourselves in the beginning,the rationilizing in the middle,and at the end well the end the realization and the choice.
will it be worth it.
love always
paulie d
| Posted on 2004-06-01 00:00:00 | by paulie d | [ Reply to This ]
  sweet write my dear...there definitely is a fine line between love and hate...i'm sure there's quite a few females out there wishing they could have come up with this one for me...

Pestiferous
| Posted on 2004-06-01 00:00:00 | by pestiferous | [ Reply to This ]
  One thing I would change here would be to add to the line "As we stand there"

Your first stanza says "As we lay there quiet", then you have "As we sat there silent"...but you left off the adjective in the last grouping that would seal in the pattern you produced. "As we stand there _______ "?
| Posted on 2004-06-01 00:00:00 | by Emerging Soul | [ Reply to This ]
  I agree with emerging soul. It would make it sound more complete. I liked it a lot. It fits a lot of my relationships too.
| Posted on 2004-06-01 00:00:00 | by Unicorn Poet | [ Reply to This ]

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