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    dots Submission Name: Rain dreamdots

    Author: Clarkie
    ASL Info:    18/F/FL
    Elite Ratio:    5.33 - 101/76/36
    Words: 56
    Class/Type: Poetry/Nature
    Total Views: 813
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 396

       I wrote this last night. I'm not sure if it's about actual drought, or just the feeling of waiting for a new idea to hit your muse. Maybe both. So, it's udner nature, but it's also a deeper metaphor than that. I have GOT to stop explaining all my poems. Oi.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsRain dreamdots

    Dreams drawn out like clouds, expansively changing,
    Life giving thunderheads, wetting desert soil
    where creatures lie dead and fruitless
    Only the dream of rain brings the bloom
    They crawl from muddied sand
    Taking over; like giving birth,
    heaving soil away, exposing new, brief life
    They will die again, to wait
    Dreaming of the rain

    Submitted on 2006-12-14 22:53:12     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I very much liked the way you circled back at the end, but then I have a soft spot for things like that.
    excellent imagery too. Just a thought, a little random but I think it could apply, maybe try working in not just sight but touch, sound, and taste too. I think this piece could explode with a bit of husky noise and dry taste laced in.

    - T T

    ps if i'm too confusing feel free to message me and i'll try harder to speak proper english.
    | Posted on 2006-12-15 00:00:00 | by TT | [ Reply to This ]

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    January 10 07
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