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    dots Submission Name: Always and foreverdots

    Author: Lover girl
    ASL Info:    17, female
    Elite Ratio:    4.39 - 83/54/24
    Words: 98
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 843
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 578


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    dotsAlways and foreverdots

    In love, peace, and harmony
    May God come fill this place
    And in each nook and crany
    May we all find his grace

    In each new thing that happens
    May the lord God guide our way
    And keep us in his glory
    Until his coming day

    For the truth is all around us
    No matter where we go
    And God will always find us
    For he will always know

    For the lesson I am teaching
    Is something we all should know
    For our lord God is omnipresent
    And though us his love will show

    Submitted on 2006-12-19 20:53:08     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      This was great...im not really into reagious writng but this one i liked alot......It went very well toghether n i don't see no problems with this piece....it good to see young teenager write bout somthing that is so touchy these days....

    well i hope to hear from ya n keep up the good work..

    | Posted on 2007-03-10 00:00:00 | by theman | [ Reply to This ]
      Great job. This is a great piece of writing. It's nice to see some people who will actually write religious poetry. I, really can't do it. Although I havent tried too much. That kind of writing I guess just isnt my style. But you can pull it off very well. Props to you!

    Well, keep up the writing.
    This is a great piece.

    | Posted on 2007-01-13 00:00:00 | by Kamerin Brown | [ Reply to This ]
      How graceful and religious of you to write this very loving poem. I loved how you made it seem as if though lord is around us all the time and within us. Very thoughful. And how you brought hope that there is truth out there, because nowadays i fell there isn't any.
    | Posted on 2006-12-25 00:00:00 | by SavedDragon | [ Reply to This ]
      This is a cute little piece. I'm not a fan of rhyming poetry and I try to avoid it whenever it's possible, but it flows well in this poem. This is a very simple piece, but I think that it works well.

    That being said, it's not the best thing I've ever read. It's not the worst either. I've written worse things I'm sure, and I've read awful things when cruising through ES. But this was cute and I enjoyed it. Maybe add a description and tell us what you were thinking about at the time. Then write again. The only way to get better is to keep writing. I think that you could do really well here if you got a little more experience.

    I look forward to reading more.

    | Posted on 2006-12-23 00:00:00 | by Zabriel | [ Reply to This ]

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