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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Maybe Notdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Liv2LoveThePain
    ASL Info:    19 - F - Philly
    Elite Ratio:    4.23 - 1527/1515/256
    Words: 212
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1088
    Average Vote:    4.5000
    Bytes: 1482



    Description:
       If you know me, you'll get it.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMaybe Notdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Love is like the rose that I put on my coffin door,
    just like the white carpet while I'm bleeding on the floor.
    Pretty at first, but it all goes away...



    Not far from where I died before,
    your wreath hangs on my bedroom door.

    It's been another year too long.
    I hear that voice in every song.
    Still seeping through once painted walls,
    it echoes slowly down the hall.

    I'll knock myself back out to sleep.
    This holiday's not mine to keep.


    Love is like the glass that's cutting through my coffin door,
    just like shiny images that pulled me in before.
    Tempting at first, but it all goes away...



    Remembering that ceiling fan,
    watching it spin out of my hands...

    I'm dancing with a ghost tonight
    until you break the Christmas lights.
    And when it's worth a thousand tears,
    I'll sing it back if no one hears.

    These decorations go away;
    tomorrow still comes anyway.


    Love is like the hammer that's been trudging through my head,
    somewhat like the ferris wheel I hang above my bed.
    Haunting at first, but it all goes away.
    So what else can I say about you?




    Submitted on 2006-12-20 17:08:14     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Your writing is very perplexing. love the way it danced across my lips. This is one of the better poems I have read in a long time. Loved the Holliday thing thrown into the mix. Thanks for sharring it with us.
    Kelley Frost
    | Posted on 2006-12-24 00:00:00 | by whendt | [ Reply to This ]
      this is really good. does this contain parts of your other poems? is that what you were reffering to in your description? anyway, it broke my heart in a way. your words are very powerful.
    | Posted on 2006-12-24 00:00:00 | by LoveToHateMe | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow. Powerful. It reminds me of when you lie in bed. Those precious moments before you fall asleep and suddenly everything comes into focus. I really love your use of words. The images you paint are quite wonderful. Keep it up :)
    | Posted on 2006-12-23 00:00:00 | by Poetic_tragedy6 | [ Reply to This ]
      I'm rather speechless.
    Honestly Nikki, this was so haunting but so beautiful.
    The whole poem just feels like a long sigh to me.
    If i think back on all of your work that I read then maybe I can understand it.
    But I do know, whatever it may mean, that it deserved a comment.
    You haven't come out with anything this good in a while I think.
    x
    | Posted on 2006-12-23 00:00:00 | by dark-red-pain | [ Reply to This ]
      This was written very well, I liked it alot, though at times I wondered what you were talking about. But I think I get it because the emotions portrayed guided me to understading this awesome piece of work. Keep up the aweosome work, and I'll keep reading.

    Saint Razor
    | Posted on 2006-12-22 00:00:00 | by brknprlcndol | [ Reply to This ]
      meep! the whispery voices scare me!!!!! but it's still amazing. it's like a poem within a poem. the not whispery one is like someone who's just like bleeeeeeeeeeeeergh i am emo and don't like the holidays and the whispery one is like hsssssssssssssssss i'm evil and i'm probably the demon in your dreams and maybe i'll kill you one day
    which is probably not what you were thinking of, but that's what it said to me. bwahahaha the words speak to me
    eerie, but neat
    write on!
    ~LoneWolf
    | Posted on 2006-12-21 00:00:00 | by LoneWolf | [ Reply to This ]
      WHOAAAAA>..i really enjoyed reading this...it flowed really well, the rhyme scheme was simple yet well structured...A for effort and A for the final product.

    the imagery and concepts were clever and seemingly original...

    Keep em coming

    NIce write..

    SIncerely
    Sinceer
    | Posted on 2006-12-20 00:00:00 | by SinCeer05 | [ Reply to This ]


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    129451

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
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