Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: To Live a Liedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Nynaeve
    ASL Info:    23, female, Israel
    Elite Ratio:    3.09 - 43/67/28
    Words: 83
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 1208
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 595



    Description:
       Just my general feeling ever since I started the university. No time.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTo Live a Liedots
    -------------------------------------------


    All I want is a fraction of my life,
    Just one moment of peace.
    Leaving all my worries behind,
    Drowning in my thirst to breath.

    All I've asked for is one moment alone,
    Facing only myself.
    Avoiding any problems I've had in the past,
    Drowning my sorrow in vain.

    Everything changes,
    Everything shifts,
    I can't keep up,
    I'm in a swirl of disbelief.

    The clock is broken,
    The numbers have vanished,
    Time stands still,
    The illusion has perished.




    Submitted on 2006-12-21 16:21:29     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This was written very well, I liked it alot. I have alot of time poems myself, but most of them are how time passes by waaaay too fast. In reading this, I couldn't find anything wring with it. It flowed well and the wording was nicely done. Keep up the awesome work, and I'll keep reading.

    Saint Razor
    | Posted on 2006-12-22 00:00:00 | by brknprlcndol | [ Reply to This ]
      I love the last stanza. It's one of those things that hits you in the face like... a brick, if you will. this entire piece is very forceful and full of emotion. Your choice of words is excellent and i commend you on this work of art.
    | Posted on 2006-12-21 00:00:00 | by lebeauvide | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    129584

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Carry written by saartha
    Sleep Talk written by Queen_of_spades
    Blood Stains Are The Worst written by ForgottenGraves
    Waiting written by Daniel Barlow
    Shi written by ShyOne
    the living moment written by ShyOne
    Love written by saartha
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Yes written by poetotoe
    no words for how graceful you are in this moment written by Daniel Barlow
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    a mood to be free written by Daniel Barlow
    a safe place written by Daniel Barlow
    an unashamed poverty written by Daniel Barlow
    Etiquette written by saartha
    Silent Screams In Silent Dreams written by poetotoe
    Cosmic Dreams written by Chelebel
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    untitled written by ShyOne
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    Formal Jen written by Daniel Barlow
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (6) written by endlessgame23
    Fasade written by jackz
    Or are we written in the sand? written by Chelebel

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry