On our plight -------------------------------------------
As we leave behind the hopes of millions in our wake
We head towards a new life and new fate
I don't know just why I am filled with negativity
Is it just a reflection on the way I think?
I don't understand just why we can't include everyone
In our march toward greater progress
I can't believe that after all these years
There are still those who are afflicted by prejudice.
Can we bring ourselves to accept that we have made
A tremendous blunder in moving ahead too fast
Or must we stubbornly insist that we are right
And abandon millions to tremendous harm
It's all upto you to decide what to think
I am just the poet who reflects on all this.
My thoughts: This is a good poem. What's primarily good about it to me is that it's not too pushy. There's a message with a sense of urgency, but you're not really ramming it down our throats. It's also mildly melancholy. Why can't we all listen? Why are we so prejudiced? Yeah, I think the message is definitely important. That does, however, bring me to what I don't like about the poem. I'm not exactly sure what it is that you're writing about. Maybe it's about nothing, maybe you're writing this with the confidence that everyone can apply it to something (which, by the way, is very true). But if you're writing about a specific experience, perhaps posting it on the description would be beneficial?
Please comment back, if it's not too much trouble - I'd love to know the meaning behind your words.
Submission Name: On our plight
