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    dots Submission Name: Another Attempt At A Love Poemdots

    Author: kase
    ASL Info:    27, Winnipeg
    Elite Ratio:    2.45 - 169/398/234
    Words: 122
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 893
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 714


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAnother Attempt At A Love Poemdots

    Ive spent many nights trying to write you a perfect piece of literature
    Now i know it doesnt exist
    People say "Words cant express what you mean to me"
    Its true, every single word
    No combinations of words perfectly detail your grace
    The way the moonlight shines off your eyes
    Or the way your cheeks turn red, after making love
    Your silhouette imprints perfect memories of you
    Your smile doesnt light up the room, it outshines the sun
    Ive wished for you to be my only one
    But i know all this, and you know it all to well
    So this is my attempt at a sweeping love poem
    Id love you lots in heaven, but for you id burn in hell

    Submitted on 2006-12-30 19:16:00     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
    Ive wished for you to be my only one
    But i know all this, and you know it all to well
    So this is my attempt at a sweeping love poem
    Id love you lots in heaven, but for you id burn in hell

    Well, something I am all too familiar. It is the longing laced to richly throughout your work that draws me in.

    I love the title for this too! As reading this write it was almost as if I wanted more of your wound in ink on the page, more depth but then coupled with the title, your first were words explained it.
    There are not enough words in any language to describe the depth in which you love her.

    Nicely done
    | Posted on 2014-05-19 00:00:00 | by clay | [ Reply to This ]
      :) your a beautiful poet! the best poems come from the heart...
    | Posted on 2013-09-29 00:00:00 | by Teofila | [ Reply to This ]
      wow, this is beautiful. this is the type of poem everyone wants written about them, read to them, and see the trueth of it in your partners eyes. This is the perfect. Your girlfriend is very lucky mister!


    | Posted on 2006-12-31 00:00:00 | by Amanda Lynn | [ Reply to This ]
      This was great, every one try to write such a great love piece and i'm even one of them people, and what you said and how short and quick you said it was amazing, such great metaphors. It flowed from start to end only thing i could say is that maybe cap. your I and small stuff like so it doesn't look like 14 year wrote it, but where am i to say that i do it all the time i'm even doing it now lol but with a piece like this and how good it is you want it to look the best it can. other than that it was amazing, im going to had it my fave's. well hope to hear from you, hit me up

    max aka lil'mix
    | Posted on 2006-12-31 00:00:00 | by theman | [ Reply to This ]
      and what a lovely attempt it is.
    as poets, i think most of us have tried to write the most dazzling love poem or sonnet, but nothing we write even comes close to what we really want to say.
    i dont think the words exist either.
    but this is gorgeous.
    excellent stuff!!
    | Posted on 2006-12-30 00:00:00 | by whirl | [ Reply to This ]

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