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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Crusheddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Midnight_Rose
    ASL Info:    18//Male//Chicago, IL
    Elite Ratio:    3.2 - 121/149/40
    Words: 237
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 657
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1650



    Description:
       You tell me... (this should be interesting)


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsCrusheddots
    -------------------------------------------


    The world's moving too fast
    And I can't keep up.

    It's like I want to lay down,
    Close my eyes,
    Take a deep breath
    And give up.

    Society has me in a rage
    To the point where I'm locked
    In an emotional cage
    And hide behind the four walls
    Of my serenity.

    Every feeling in me
    Is confused and scared
    And I dare not imagine
    Where I'll be tomorrow
    Or the day after.

    The future's grim.
    It's covered in a shadow
    That I can't relate to.

    So my mother tells me
    To enjoy life while I still can
    And my father tells me
    To step up and be a man.

    It's not fair
    But that's life
    Although the world should,
    For once,
    Show some compassion for its actions,
    For misleading the young
    That beauty last forever

    Life has me tossed around,
    Broke down,
    Stuck in a psychological fatality
    Making dreams, not just dreams,
    But, an escape from reality,
    From the screams, the killing,
    The stealing, the fulfilling
    Of the "American Dream."

    I look at myself in the mirror
    And laugh a little
    And smile a bit.

    I wipe the tears from my eyes.
    Why do I need to cry?
    Because I had some hard times
    In my life?

    It's like what they say,
    What doesn't kill you
    Makes you stronger.

    I'm still standing.




    Submitted on 2007-01-05 14:27:09     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      this is kinda weird for me to say but this made me cry, tell you truth i'm not sure why maybe i can relate to it...i think i can except for the still standing part, i don't feel like i'm standing on my own 2 feet anymore like i've been knoked down by what everyone wants and iam struggling to make up my own mind. nobodies really living the dream, as you said why should i cry because i've had some hard times in my life? anyway i liked it alot it brought up alot of emotions for me not sure if they were ones that should of been brought up because of this but it did anyway so thank you! great write, i truly liked it. -jess-
    | Posted on 2007-01-05 00:00:00 | by gothicgirl | [ Reply to This ]
      A very powerful piece with a plenthora of emotions from what life is throwing your way. I liked the way this is straight forward with what you are thinking i always try to hide behind my words. Glad to hear that so far you are still standing.
    | Posted on 2007-01-05 00:00:00 | by isis_lenore | [ Reply to This ]
      This is neat, I like the end where you stand up and say that your still staning. Man, I know life can really knock you down sometimes, i've been pretty low, not as low as some people I know though. Thats a great conclusion though, I'm bad at ending my poems, they just seem to keep going and I always have more to say oh well... Anyways, this is really neat to read and I wish you luck for any future writings you make!
    ~*~
    -Sas
    | Posted on 2007-01-05 00:00:00 | by Sasafraz | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow. This definitly was interesting. It was like a whirlwind of emotions; like a hurricane almost, then the last stanza, and last line, are like when the storm clears, and the sky's all yellow. It's really cool:)

    This was my favorite stanza

    "Life has me tossed around,
    Broke down,
    Stuck in a psychological fatality
    Making dreams, not just dreams,
    But, an escape from reality,
    From the screams, the killing,
    The stealing, the fulfilling
    Of the "American Dream.""

    It's just so angry and, idk, in your face i guess.

    Great job, don't know if i was anywhere close to the meaning, but it was cool:)

    Lia
    | Posted on 2007-01-05 00:00:00 | by Glassy Eyed | [ Reply to This ]


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