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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: "You...don't want...me?"dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Persephone
    ASL Info:    19/f/ US
    Elite Ratio:    3.53 - 328/352/136
    Words: 145
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 1000
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1308



    Description:
       This is about a coach that told me she didn't want me anymore. By want, she meant she was kicking me out because she no longer needed me. She didn't tell me it face to face, but instead wrote it in a letter.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dots"You...don't want...me?"dots
    -------------------------------------------


    "You...don't want...me..."
    The words were clear,
    but my mind wouldn't understand,
    isn't this the place where I grew up?

    "Don't want..."
    To not need or require,
    But wasn't I a friend,
    can you move on without me?

    "You...me..."
    two seperate individuals,
    spereate...not connected,
    Free to let the other go.

    "You...don't want...me..."
    Rejection...cold and hard,
    unwanted, unneeded,
    discarded like yesterdays trash.

    "Don't want...me..."
    Who do you want then?
    I'll be them if you won't let go...
    Please...I don't want to leave...

    "You...don't want...me..."
    But you couldn't say it to my face,
    maybe somethings lost in the letter.
    No.

    "You don't want me..."
    The word never should be added.
    "You never wanted me..."
    Now you don't need me.

    Next time, tell me...

    "You never wanted me...
    You don't need me...
    You don't want me."
    Rejection beyond belief.




    Submitted on 2007-01-10 18:22:52     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    1: >_<
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    3: meh!
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    ||| Comments |||
      I'm sorry too!!! I want you...(don't think dirty yet)to be happy again!

    ~orange
    | Posted on 2007-02-22 00:00:00 | by orange | [ Reply to This ]
      K...I love you. I'm sorry for your pain and your loss. By the way...my foot is all better now!
    | Posted on 2007-01-15 00:00:00 | by jennah | [ Reply to This ]
      I really like how you examined each part of the phrase "you don't want me" separately, in different combinations, and built upon the meaning as you went along. Like Sasafraz said, it really adds emphasis to the poem. And personally, I think sad poems are necessary to help us deal with feelings that we might otherwise try to bury inside, which is not good in the long run. Loved the uniqueness of it!
    | Posted on 2007-01-12 00:00:00 | by Dandelion13 | [ Reply to This ]
      This is great, I like how you break apart the words to try and get the full meaning. It really adds emphisis on what your saying. Great poem, sure its sad, but I dont have one happy poem either Anyways, good luck on any future writings, and remember, Life may be hard at times, but if you can just hold on one more minute, it will get better.
    ~*~
    -Sas
    | Posted on 2007-01-10 00:00:00 | by Sasafraz | [ Reply to This ]


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