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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Love, Life, Oracledots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lolavie
    ASL Info:    23/female/Michigan
    Elite Ratio:    3.26 - 70/175/103
    Words: 48
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Misc
    Total Views: 486
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 315



    Description:
       Short and unfinished, but what do you think? Who do you think I wrote it for and why? Just want feedback in general, please. I have a cute little melody for it too. But, please comment, thank you.

    [Picture,"lips and lillies from 2003" taken by Rebecca Cusworth Photography]


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLove, Life, Oracledots
    -------------------------------------------


    Forever never comes
    Today goes away
    Yesterday will always be there
    when we need it,
    stop to heed
    and be what I saw when I first saw you
    Remember the truth, don't you wanna be free
    Let me in, don't leave me standing all alone
    when you're home...




    Submitted on 2007-01-16 04:29:50     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    1: >_<
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    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      To me this sort of sounds like you are talking to a new love that may have been hurt. I may be way off but that is what I got out of it.

    To me it is saying, although you have been hurt please let me in.

    We are never any closer to FOREVER, that is true. Even after we die, how could we possibly be any closer to the forever of the world. Today ends, so does it's pain....but tomorrow will always be there. You can still remember when......

    I feel stupid now, I feel that I am way off.

    sorry
    yourwinterdays
    | Posted on 2007-01-16 00:00:00 | by longwinterdays | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    132187

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
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