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You revised

Author: sweet_rayne
ASL Info:    25/f/canada
Elite Ratio:    3.86 - 493 /464 /111
Words: 137
Class/Type: Misc /Love
Total Views: 1271
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 820


this is revised in the sense that i added to it lol, as for the rhyming sequence it is supposed to be like that,

You revised

You came to me
One dark snowy night

You pulled me from the
Darkness and showed me light

You taught me how
To smile again

By showing me there is
No shame in shedding tears

You taught me to live again
By helping me over come my fears

You showed me how to laugh once more
By helping me break down my many doors

I can see beauty in all that surrounds me
Because you turned me inside out

Because of you I learned to feel
Even when I knew it wouldn’t last

But because of you my life is real
And you will always be a happy memory in my past

A memory to get me through each day
Because I knew you could never stay

Submitted on 2007-01-20 01:58:07     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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5: Wow!


I like the revisions you made. I honestly believe it is a better write for its changes. That is the great thing about being a writer you can always go back and change something if you don't like it. Its better than being an artist in my opinion because paint doesn't erase and pencil and ink do. Keep up the great work my friend.

| Posted on 2007-01-20 00:00:00 | by sageeriol | [ Reply to This ]

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