Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Anything With Youdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Raivn
    ASL Info:    33/f/al
    Elite Ratio:    4.28 - 1222/916/231
    Words: 252
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 714
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1543



    Description:
       The difference between love and more casual things...for me, anyway.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAnything With Youdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Touch me if you want
    I can see that it gets you hot
    You say I'm so turned on
    I hate to tell you, but I'm not
    I keep it to myself
    I can't feel anything with you
    But I let you use my body
    Hey, it's something I can do
    So, as you thrust yourself inside me
    I quietly close my eyes
    You think I'm almost there,
    But, dear, my body lies.

    You mean nothing to me
    You'll never turn me on
    In fact, I do this in remembrance of
    The one I loved who's gone
    You mean nothing to me
    In fact, the sex is much too tame
    I'll never feel a thing with you
    And I'll never be the same

    I can remember what he felt like
    And the way he kissed my lips
    And I'll never forget the sensation of
    His hands upon my hips
    I remember how he drove me crazy
    With just a flick of his tongue
    How he brought my entire body to life,
    And god, he was so young
    He would throw me against the wall
    And precede to make me his whore
    And I'll never forget those feelings
    Though we are no more

    So, you mean nothing to me
    You just can't get it done
    And I keep on doing this
    Even though you're not the one
    You mean nothing to me
    You'll never make me wet
    You're just here to pass the time
    He's the one I'll never forget.




    Submitted on 2007-01-20 19:06:14     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      "IT REALLY HAS TO BE UNDERSTOOD TO ELAIN"IT'S THAT KIND OF POEM
    | Posted on 2007-05-08 00:00:00 | by SAMEER | [ Reply to This ]
      I really like it. I mean I get it all, sometimes you just are with someone because you need to feel like you are worth something, to pass the time, to forget, maybe even to replace. But nothing ever works. Because you are just sick of feeling so low, you let things happen, and you forget about caring. Very very nice write, great flow, great timing. Magnificent. I may even return the favor of you adding me as a fav, and I can add yours :)

    -Randee
    | Posted on 2007-03-05 00:00:00 | by UnderlinedInRed | [ Reply to This ]
      This was a very awesome poem. It was written very well, it flowed nicely, and it portrayed much emotion. I couldn't really find anything wrong with it. I think I liked it so much because I can relate to it alot. I haven't exactly been through the process of losing one that made me feel so umm.. great, but I know any other but him inside me wouldn't even register. Great write. Keep up the fantastic work, and I'll keep reading.

    Saint Razor.
    | Posted on 2007-01-20 00:00:00 | by brknprlcndol | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    132642

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (1) written by endlessgame23
    prison written by ShyOne
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Life is moments written by Ramneet
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Shi written by ShyOne
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    Tartarus written by endlessgame23
    Cover written by saartha

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry