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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Hellodots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: I_m not Broken
    ASL Info:    17/F/IDK
    Elite Ratio:    2.75 - 91/98/68
    Words: 147
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 663
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 958



    Description:
       I was pregnant, and was a pawn in a deadly game of chess. I either had to have an abortion, or go to jail, then be on house arrst until i had the child.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsHellodots
    -------------------------------------------


    Buds blooming at your feet
    And one inside of you
    This secret is discreet
    An unwanted child growing
    Becoming slowly a life

    Words of discouragement
    Words of pain
    These people won't relent
    Their goal is plain and clear
    A child must die before they are pleased

    you cry and you scream
    You beg to be freed
    They claim you soul is unclean
    As you dream of the future
    Lying to yourself in bliss

    Time flies unknown promises are made
    Your lying in a clinic waiting your turn
    High as a kite, biting your lip
    A ife was taken today

    Sleep if off, take these pills
    Your child sleeps forever in a trash can
    Don' worry, your life goes on
    But so does this memory....
    Yet they never tell you that

    You can't say goodbye
    If you never got to say Hello




    Submitted on 2007-01-21 15:01:26     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    ||| Comments |||
      alright. i loved when people tackle issues that no one ever wants to talk about. this hits pretty hard and is very vivid in your feelings. great word choices and the last line wraps it all up very nicely. keep it up. only minor spell errors.
    :-) laterr
    | Posted on 2007-02-18 00:00:00 | by lark | [ Reply to This ]
      Very good on a touchy topic. I believe its a woman's choice but it must have been extremely hard to do and i can't relate so i am not gonna say that i can. Us girls go through a lot and what you have written very touching: I like that last line: "You can't say goodbye If you never got to say hello" hope to read more from you.
    | Posted on 2007-01-21 00:00:00 | by michelle8586 | [ Reply to This ]
      This very deep on very touchy topic. I can kinda realte with my ex-girl being pregant going though all the name calling all the choices to make. Honetsly i think girls/woman are mentally stronger than a male with all the [censored] they have to go though.


    I loved the ending very powerfull, ends the piece like i want more.

    My fave lines where

    "Sleep if off, take these pills
    Your child sleeps forever in a trash can
    Don' worry, your life goes on
    But so does this memory....
    Yet they never tell you that"

    "You can't say goodbye
    If you never got to say Hello"


    "
    Words of discouragement
    Words of pain
    These people won't relent
    Their goal is plain and clear
    A child must die before they are pleased"


    hope to hear from ya and keep up the good work.

    Max
    Aka
    Lil'Mix
    | Posted on 2007-01-21 00:00:00 | by theman | [ Reply to This ]


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