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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Innocencedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Non-Sens-Uality
    Elite Ratio:    2.94 - 67/80/53
    Words: 130
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 888
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 851



    Description:
       Abstracts...


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsInnocencedots
    -------------------------------------------


    Did roses ever taste the wine?
    On marble white, on stairs of ice...
    Did sympathy - a lie sublime -
    Ever carve pain into your eyes?

    Did nights of sin, forever dark
    Caress the memory of you -
    Who once - illusion of a park,
    Now forest deep, with trees in blue.

    Did lips promise to light a candle?
    In frozen moments of your heart...
    Did words enslave a sad, sad journal
    With words of wisdom's icecold art?

    Did angels ever close their wings,
    And voices - muses of the spheres
    When only one nightigale sings...
    Of heavens colored in saphirs.


    And demons with their brilliance
    Ever seduce your soul with flames?
    And did you loose your innocence
    In the forbidden realm of games?...




    Submitted on 2007-01-25 20:36:23     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

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    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      You would not believe how very much this poem fits my present condition or you could even call it a faze. Quite abstract? Yes! And that's a good thing. But it's also very deep and I, at least from my eyes, can see a meaning in it. Your descriptions are subtly extravagant and beautiful and I enjoyed this very much. You hit a wire.
    | Posted on 2007-02-15 00:00:00 | by Porcelaine | [ Reply to This ]
      this is the best thing i've read since the last time i put that somewhere.....i loved it. the imagery the questions i thought it was all wonderfully put. great job.
    | Posted on 2007-01-27 00:00:00 | by ira | [ Reply to This ]
      wow, this is incredible.
    i read your works all the time and it always gets better and better.
    this is totally going into the favorites add.
    i'm with Max. on how deep it really was.

    Did angels ever close their wings,
    And voices - muses of the spheres
    When only one nightingale sings...
    Of heavens colored in saphirres.

    that stanza really grabbed me.
    it flowed very beautifully.
    great job.
    Peace<3


    <bleedingtears>
    | Posted on 2007-01-26 00:00:00 | by BleedingTears | [ Reply to This ]
      This poem was very deep. I like how you made it flow and yet managed to make every line signifigent. there are a few technical errors: a few misspelled words and some basic grammar error but its an overall good poem. dont worry i still dont really know how to use commas. Kudos for an overall good write.

    ~Max
    | Posted on 2007-01-26 00:00:00 | by Max R. | [ Reply to This ]


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    133128

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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    January 10 07
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