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    dots Submission Name: My Planetdots

    Author: DBC
    ASL Info:    21/m/ar
    Elite Ratio:    2.77 - 55/59/29
    Words: 172
    Class/Type: Prose/Misc
    Total Views: 867
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 976


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    dotsMy Planetdots

    oh boy broadway is lighting up

    i can see my name in lights

    people screaming, fucking screaming, god the noise

    while the density of my planet gives me strength it also leaches my very being

    im not talking of earth, no i left that plain long ago.

    i talk of my own creation, something i made in 7 minutes and deemed "good"

    so on the 7th minute i rested taking pride in the fact that i did in 7 minutes what took god 7 days

    i thought myself ever so clever, that i did not notice i never put oxygen on this planet

    just as well i never believed in oxygen, but modern physics defied me and i began to gasp for air

    i cried out for god, begging for mercy, for death, for life, for anything except this suffocation

    but the walls i had built around my planet could not be penetrated by your god, and so my body decayed.

    Submitted on 2007-01-26 00:31:53     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      i like it... the begaining was a bit rough but the rest more than compensated for that, the substance is good but it's the delivery that catches in my throught. but if thats your still take no offence. some people like whisky but rum doents burn quite as much....

    | Posted on 2007-05-10 00:00:00 | by in shadow | [ Reply to This ]

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