[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Conclusion of an Epic dots

    Author: lori_tab
    ASL Info:    27/f/alabama
    Elite Ratio:    4.33 - 1752/1517/481
    Words: 949
    Class/Type: Story/Serious
    Total Views: 804
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 5518

       for class...

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsConclusion of an Epic dots

    Gendel and Apathy were born inside the childs mind. Apathy was a creature living in the mind, a creature uncapable of any feeling other than hate. Apathy was a tortured, tortured by what she was. She took her pain and she used it as a sword against ideas that lived inside the child. She fed off the ideas and lay fat and pregnant inside a hell in the mind of the child. Pregnant with ignorance, born to the mind and named Grendel. Grendel held Apathy's hate, he was her hate, her blade of death. Apathy slept in hell while Grendel fed off ideas in the childs mind. He lived near the childs attention where the ideas came from.
    Few ideas still existed inside the mind. They hid in shallow pools throughout the vast valleys of the brain. They hid inside dreams, holy and pure,from the subconcious. Grendel could not enter the dreams, dare not enter. Nothing as completely evil as himself could survive in a place like the dreams. They were an untouched uncorrupted place, if Grendel entered the dreams they would soon become nightmares and the child would wake and he would be trapped, he would be erased from the childs mind.
    Tonight the child lay dreaming. Apathy slept in her hell and Grendel walked in the mind unconscious, in a trance like state while the childs attention held his dreams. Outside the childs mind, in a music box across the room a hero slid into vibrations and soundwaves that traveled through the air and into the ears of the child. The hero was Knowledge, his name was Beowulf. Beowulf was a traveler, spread through life and passed on and on. His purpose was to erase ignorance and apathy in their many forms. He came from from books and lived inside minds, to be passed on once attained, through the mouth of people he occupied and onto others that could hear of him. He lived in paintings and music, many different places where knowledge and ideas could be found.
    While the child slept and Grendel was unaware, Beowulf slipped into the mind through the subconscious. He greeted the ideas and talked with them of his plans to rid them of the evil inside the mind of the child. He would be the protector of ideas. The ideas regarded Beowulf with skepticism, laced thinly with hope.
    Spoke from the ideas, "What makes you capable of conquering Apathy and her conceived fruit when no one else has?"
    Beowulf smiled and replied, "Because I am knoledge, and I have come to you, to this child, through dreams. I have faith that I will not be forgotten like many of his ideas. I live and come from far away, I am clever and the child will remember me."
    And with these words the ideas rejoiced and dined on the only thing that ideas have to dine on. There was a great feast and they were happy. The ideas didn't know how Grendel would be defeated, but Knowledge had come, and he had come to be remembered.
    Once the child woke, from the pits of hell, Apathy, bearing hunger and hatred opened her eyes. She yawned, stretched...cood and finally called after Grendel. Grendel came quickly. He stood at Apathy's feet and waited for her to speak.

    When words did come from her salivating tunnel, they came as emaciated whispers.
    Her whispers, " Grendel, I am starved. I am weak and laying in this hell growing weaker still. I cannot move to feed myself, but you have the strength of the immortal. You can get ideas for me and I can gain my strength and then we will, my darling ignorance, be able to conquer this mind at last. It will be our home."


    Grendel left at once, wasting no time he started towards the direction of the subconscious. Grendel walked with increasing momentum, grunting and stomping his ugly feet, he advanced in the direction of dreams.
    The ideas gathered in the corner of dreams. Humid tension sucked at the air inside the subconscious and replaced it with a thick suffocating wetness. Beowulf stood in the middle of the room, solemnly holding his head down, as if praying. Grendel came inside, tearing tissue and cells as he tore the door from its hinges. Beowulf steadied himself as Grendel advanced towards him. Inside it became dark, a feeling of fear choked through the room. The ideas trembled inside the dreams that were quickly turning to nightmares. The warriors fought and the tension rose. The ideas gasped for air as Beowulf tore hair and flesh from Grendels body. Grendel screamed, the tension growing, growing, growing, the ideas trembling, fear mounting. All at once the child woke. He looked about his room, searching for light in his bedroom. He clutched to his sheets, violently trying to shake his fear from his nightmare from him like sweat. The child sobbed, paying no mind to the audibility of his vioce. The radio continued to play, for a moment turned to static and then a melody drifted from the speakers. The child lowered his head to his pillow, looking still around the room. His eyes fluttered, the sleep he'd been trying to push away overcame him. A dream crept upon the child, the dream filled with clever ideas that formed the face of a Bard that told the child great stories. The child's mind was wiped clean, free from ignorance, Apathy soon to die. Knowledge sacrificed to the greater good.

    Submitted on 2007-01-27 19:48:45     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Okay, I like it. The conclusion threw me a little bit. I suppose it would be helpful had I actually read the original story. Which I mean to do.

    Some day...
    | Posted on 2007-01-28 00:00:00 | by Raivn | [ Reply to This ]
      hey hi long time no write or talk i hope all is good

    this was a good story but as always i like your writes i havent been writing to much lately

    great write sandman
    | Posted on 2007-01-28 00:00:00 | by sandman | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Giving written by jjd
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    To Glow written by krs3332003
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Incubus written by monad
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    This written by Chelebel
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]