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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Perfect Metaphordots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Soulraven
    ASL Info:    31/Male/Illinois
    Elite Ratio:    4.05 - 510/481/142
    Words: 108
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 902
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 735



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsPerfect Metaphordots
    -------------------------------------------


    Love beats you till youíre sore.
    Heart dangling from the gallows, the perfect metaphor.
    Tunnel sight leaves things unclear.
    Everything falls apart and disappears.
    The heart crushed into dust.
    Hate replaces love which isnít enough.
    I canít let such feelings return.
    Iím afraid of the lessons I have yet to learn.
    Things that erupt and stab.
    Wounds that stay a grossly scab.
    Emotions that prevail in discolored swirl.
    Love hollowed out by a single girl.
    Love thatís not worth the risk.
    Pain thatís sharp and brisk.
    Pain is the only feeling that helps you know youíre alive.
    To bad it also leaves you empty and lonely inside.




    Submitted on 2004-01-31 00:32:42     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This I like! especially "Heart dangling from the gallows, the perfect metaphor." I like the themes and metaphors in most of your work, but some (to me) need a bit more shine. This one shines already. Silver
    | Posted on 2004-02-01 00:00:00 | by Silverdog | [ Reply to This ]
      sad, but well writen. I like the line "hate replaces love which isn't enough".
    good one.
    | Posted on 2004-01-31 00:00:00 | by eve1684 | [ Reply to This ]
      This is good stuff. Reminds me of a time in my life. Excellent.
    | Posted on 2004-01-31 00:00:00 | by Scribner | [ Reply to This ]


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