[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Darking Dawndots

    Author: Shadow_Mirror
    ASL Info:    23/m/CA
    Elite Ratio:    4.59 - 54/39/18
    Words: 107
    Class/Type: Poetry/Dark
    Total Views: 936
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 709

       I made this out what I could... I haven't written in quite awhile, so please give me some lee way, lol... anyway hope you people enjoy it!

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDarking Dawndots

    This morning the sun is rising,
    with its rise, the black clouds of lightning form above,
    while I await my judgment below,
    the wind stirs, whipping my hair to and fro.
    The lightning cracks, but I still stand,
    'May my sins and deeds be laid bare, and weighed equally!' echoes to the heavens, making the challenge.
    One strike, two, three.... still standing once again.
    The clouds start to recede, leaving only light of dawn.
    'So another day goes by,
    with my blacked,
    shattered soul still here...'

    ...The dawn leads forward to another day....
    ...where it is only the beginning of another ending...

    Submitted on 2007-01-29 23:17:43     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      wow, kinda...eerie and foreboding.
    great write tho'.

    'where it is only the beginning of another ending...'

    this i like...it ends this perfectly, makes the reader want more, but at the same time, draw their own conclusion...if ya understand me.
    really nice work, and where have you been????
    you aint posted in like....FOREVER!!! LOL

    enjoyed this,
    | Posted on 2007-01-30 00:00:00 | by whirl | [ Reply to This ]
      This is really good
    It is true that from the moment of our birth we are preparing for death
    You worded that really well
    The Good thing is Death is not the end as it leads to Eternal Life
    And That is also the truth
    I wait mpatiently for the day I can enter eternal life
    I also like how you talked about there always being good and bad as you spoke of when you were referring to the 3 strikes
    Excellent work!!
    God Bless

    Please if you get a chance Please take a look at some of my writes and let me know what you think
    Thank You
    | Posted on 2007-01-30 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]