Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Remaining Truedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Amanda Lynn
    Elite Ratio:    3.09 - 332/193/56
    Words: 132
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 753
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 796



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsRemaining Truedots
    -------------------------------------------


    Donít ask me not to love you.
    Donít beg me to walk away.
    Donít think that I can remove
    all these feelings
    because of words you say.
    You canít control thatÖ
    there not yours to throw away,
    and I will love you as long as I want to
    no matter how fast you walk away.
    Your harsh words can hurt me.
    Your distance can cause me pain.
    Your anger can scare
    but it canít compare
    to all the love that I haveÖ
    to these feelings that remain.
    I told you forever,
    I told you Iím yours,
    I canít take it back now,
    I canít shut the door.
    My tears are my own
    but every thing else belongs to you,
    discard them if you will
    but they will always remain true.




    Submitted on 2007-01-30 15:46:49     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      nothing worse than unrequited love, but instead of the usual pleading, I like the strength behind the words " they're not yours to throw away" an original take on an age old feeling.
    7/10
    | Posted on 2007-01-30 00:00:00 | by Ben Gunn | [ Reply to This ]
      oh, this is heartbreaking. i really feel this one. doesn't matter what is said or done...your love will always be true...very beautiful...but so very sad.
    excellent piece.
    michelle
    | Posted on 2007-01-30 00:00:00 | by whirl | [ Reply to This ]
      Its a nice piece and sounds like what would be a top quality song verse you should put it under lyrics.
    I like the use of repetition when you say i told you and also i can't take good work!
    | Posted on 2007-01-30 00:00:00 | by Mr R | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    133538

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
    Watch them Die written by HisNameIsNoMore
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    On Top of a Water Wheel written by Wolfwatching
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    A Fire! A Knife! A Black Crow Calls! written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    I'm here written by BloodtornAngel
    Aftermath and Waltz written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Skulls Beyond the Palisade written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    When Crows Tick on Windows written by metallichick786
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Blood to Plowshares written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The First Time written by Wolfwatching
    Still written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Dirge of Nostalgia written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Search written by HisNameIsNoMore
    This written by Chelebel
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    To the Epilogue written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Can't let my demons go written by faideddarkness
    Stretto written by saartha
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    Commencement written by Ramneet
    Genesis written by saartha
    Tides of Man written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry