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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: timedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: crazy_83
    ASL Info:    28/f/mo
    Elite Ratio:    1.99 - 27/29/18
    Words: 68
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 855
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 406



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotstimedots
    -------------------------------------------


    I remember yesterday
    it seemed to just pass by
    i yelled for the rain
    but the clouds were to high

    I saw the distant future
    it seemed only a lie
    my life was so different
    and all i could think was why

    I was caught in a moment today
    time seemed to stop forever
    i was free for that second
    floating like a feather....




    Submitted on 2007-02-04 00:45:14     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      The first stanza is awesome. The wording in this poem is simple, but I find I do like it. I like the idea of yelling for the rain, and I like how you tied it all into time. A little stuck on the cliché, but I think it has serious potential. Also, it's not overly long. Very nice work.
    | Posted on 2007-02-06 00:00:00 | by awastedsky | [ Reply to This ]


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    January 10 07
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