[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: War of the Wordsdots

    Author: saartha
    ASL Info:    27/F/US
    Elite Ratio:    4.05 - 230/385/134
    Words: 64
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 820
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 523

       This is an allegorical poem using war as a metaphor for creating poetry/prose. This pretty much describes my writing process.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWar of the Wordsdots


    Between the turbulence
    Of ink and mauled words,
    frenzied fingers racing
    to the backspace bomb
    (Delete delete-delete-delete),
    And the subdued euphoria
    Of leaning back and watching
    As the survivors of the massacre
    Form solemn lines in eulogy,
    A tribute for their fallen comrades,
    To take one last stand and
    Hurl themselves against the snow—

    There is beauty.

    Submitted on 2007-02-11 12:51:46     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      This is good. I like the way you've structured it, so that the whole frenzied "war" takes place between the dashes, with the polished part "somewhere there is beauty" framing it. It's like you've opened a window onto the rawest parts of your writing process that are usually hidden, although I'm sure the words in the centre in fact themselves underwent much editing.

    And yeah, I can definitely relate.

    T x
    | Posted on 2007-06-07 00:00:00 | by tulip | [ Reply to This ]
      I don't usually edit as fanatically as you do, my philosophy is the first time it comes out, it better come out right or it's pointless. As a result, I usually keep the not-so-right ones for when I'm bored and work on them. Occasionally something does come out of that, but it's never "the Azuire style" if you get what I mean.
    I like how you turned a commonplace occurence (to poets anyway) into a deadly war with "delete" as the ultimate weapon. Do you type out your poems on a computer?
    I like the last line "hurl themselves against the snow."
    | Posted on 2007-03-12 00:00:00 | by Azuire | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh yes...I have waged this war. And it is marvelous. And no one can understand unless they have fought alongside you on this literary battlefield. This is perfect...
    | Posted on 2007-02-13 00:00:00 | by Raivn | [ Reply to This ]
      Very interusting concept. Much different than my writing style, which tends to just involve flow to a beat or song in my head, then revision to fit it better, often the next day :-p.
    | Posted on 2007-02-11 00:00:00 | by Ygi | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Giving written by jjd
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    This written by Chelebel
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Linger written by saartha
    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Push written by JanePlane
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    The Promise written by annie0888
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    untitled written by Chelebel
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Wavelength written by saartha
    To written by SavedDragon




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]