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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Her Eyesdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Ishtar
    Elite Ratio:    2.64 - 19/24/15
    Words: 83
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 483
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 463



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsHer Eyesdots
    -------------------------------------------


    She looked at me,
    Her eyes round were like almonds stretched over infinite shades of amber

    Her voiced reached outward, and for the life of me I could not answer her,
    Any words I could say would fall out of my mouth like angry daggers

    And puncture her heart like a needle through a rose petal,
    I will not speak without using my true voice,
    And I will not touch fire for the sake of being burned.




    Submitted on 2007-02-21 23:33:05     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I like minimalistic pieces and felt that you portrayed strong feelings and emotions in this piece - I liked the opening stanza and the last line - good!

    Happy Day!
    love,peace,joy&smiles to share
    tif
    | Posted on 2007-02-23 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
      MMM... could be more in depth, it kinda felt like you couldn't come up with anything else, so just decided to leave it unfinished. I reallyliked the line, "puncture her heart like a needle through a rose petal," the imagry is strong.

    ~orange
    | Posted on 2007-02-22 00:00:00 | by orange | [ Reply to This ]


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