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The Last Dance


Author: SammySueYou
ASL Info:    23/f/nm
Elite Ratio:    3.05 - 90 /78 /30
Words: 172
Class/Type: Poetry /Betrayal
Total Views: 969
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 1052



Description:


Newest Poem About the Cheating Heart...Enjoy


The Last Dance



The wind caused me to squirm and and shiver,
much like a person who drowned in the river.
Maggots swimming in my stomach as I devour a heart,
ripping the tendons and flesh right apart.
Smoking into clouds of illusion,
budding into a helpless intrusion.
My limbs sink into the crusty folds of a sheet ,
disapearing from my reality like seasons in fleet.
My mind has formed a coccoon of lies,
when time runs out a part of me dies.
I melt into acid and eat away your words,
I take your sanity and feed it to the birds.
Leave me alone! I will only hurt you more,
the things I have done you can never ignore.
SCREAMING! SHOUTING!
Suddenly doubting!
Why must I be the one to be wrong?
your lasting neglect is stuck like a song.
Entrapped like a fetus with nothing but walls,
deaf to the pleading of unwanted calls.
I don't love you, there isnt a chance,
I'll do you one better and save the last dance.




Submitted on 2007-02-23 01:10:22     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  Like your style, but would suggest only one thing. Try to break up the rhyming with either a repeating word/phrase (Every 4/5 lines), or with a few lines that don't rhyme.
Your description and language are quality, just work on the technical side.
| Posted on 2007-02-23 00:00:00 | by Jbills | [ Reply to This ]


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