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    dots Submission Name: Bean Popperdots

    Author: Jbills
    ASL Info:    30/m/IL
    Elite Ratio:    3.52 - 57/68/29
    Words: 103
    Class/Type: Poetry/Legend
    Total Views: 841
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 777


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    dotsBean Popperdots

    Party with no goals
    Insecure with no souls

    Strive to have drive
    Learn your lesson
    Laughing at life

    Euphoric endeavors
    Suffocate the clever
    Frustrated as fuck
    Socializing is severed

    A pessimistic session of sorts
    Concerning brain waves,
    And why your sight fades

    Do you want to cope,
    Like the post-experimental?
    Can you hope?
    Cusí these feelings are not a rental.

    Who knew this was
    The only buzz
    To cause permanent fuzz

    As dusted as a desert
    I trusted this treason
    For reasons on loan

    Holes that canít be sewn,
    Rolls with contents unknown

    Submitted on 2007-02-23 04:25:17     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      I'd say intense and stern like the look of a disappointed father. Flow issues yes, but who can talk straight in anger?
    | Posted on 2013-01-26 00:00:00 | by Darkwarrior | [ Reply to This ]
      I like it. Some flow issues, as people always say about my stuff. But yeah, I really like the idea and it is hard hitting. In the begginning it seemed kind of forced in the first stanza but then it turned into a sort of...I dont want to say forced...but tough. Like every stanza is like a thud in your mind. You read it and its like a brick falling down, but it continues throughout the poem as a sort of structure. So yeah...in conclusion I really liked it, it all worked out quite well.

    | Posted on 2007-02-24 00:00:00 | by UnderlinedInRed | [ Reply to This ]

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    January 10 07
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