Tender Loving Care by deluka

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Submission Name: Tender Loving Care dots

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Author:	deluka
Elite Ratio:	8 - 143/71/27
Words:	100

Class/Type:	Poetry/Love
Total Views:	261
Average Vote:	4.5000
Bytes:	643

Description:
for my girl kelly aka clay

Tender Loving Care dots

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Rest your head on my shoulder
tell me about this pain

I will help you through it
to make you happy again

Let me lift up your spirit
turn that sad face around

Make you laugh till it hurts
and good tears fall down

Sadnesss isn't in my dictionary
when I think of you

It breaks my heart to notice
the times when your blue

When ever you need me
it doesn't matter what time

I will always be here for you
precious daughter of mine

Submitted on 2007-02-23 15:21:36 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
  I guess being a parent doesn't end when they the nest. I love this for its rawness and just plain truth. I again can relate to this. I have to tell you that while I have been here on ES I have only found a few writers that write like this and about their children.

This is great and I can see that your daughter likes it too.

Keep writing

Deepest respect and Admiration

Clyde
| Posted on 2007-08-20 00:00:00 | by Wisdom Seeker | [ Reply to This ]
  This is sweet and nice and reminds me of a piece that I wrote for a friend of my who has cancer, and she has a daughter. only I think the 6th line feels rushed when I read it out loud or maybe its just me.

The Poor Man's Poet.
| Posted on 2007-07-24 00:00:00 | by Bobby K | [ Reply to This ]
  Now, after reading this lovely little Piece I am beginning to believe that I know who you are as well. But I'm not gonna rat you out.

PS: Is your hubby still writing also?
| Posted on 2007-05-12 00:00:00 | by ErgoIgo | [ Reply to This ]
  hold up hold up hold up!!
you are kellys mother?
does that mean that you are/were married to the dude who was duffriffs (or something really close to that) on this site?

coz thats madness if you are!
total and complete madness!

anyways...
this is a beautiful poem.
my mother once wrote me a poem. my mother cannot write for anything. infact she admits that it was a god inspired piece. now me myself... i hope that god can write better poetry than that but just that my mother wasnt listening proply but anyways...
i think this is a beautiful gesture.

for the most part i am not a fan of 4 line stanza pieces that rhyme but i think you have almost used this "magic formula" to your advantage because it doesnt seem to confine or stunt the message you are bringing to your daughter (and incidentally the reader)

i feel like i am intruding on this beautiful moment. like i walked into some mother/daughter moment where the daughter needs encouragement only her mother can give.

i think your picture aids this piece beautifully. one day i would love to be able to take a picture and give it words but not yet... i couldnt possibly do any art work justice yet...

beautiful piece
| Posted on 2007-04-30 00:00:00 | by Someones Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
  Beautiful Write! This is such a sweet, loving poem......so heartfelt and touching. It is just the kind of poem a parent would write for his child...as every parent desires that his child always be happy! Great Write! : )
| Posted on 2007-04-02 00:00:00 | by mdsouza | [ Reply to This ]
  Hi,

Great write,liked the 2nd paragraph.

Reminded me when I spend a few days in the hospital, family and friends and a trusty book and the one that keeps my heart safe, got me through the gloominess of a hospital bed.

Kind regards
Eric
| Posted on 2007-02-24 00:00:00 | by bornx2000 | [ Reply to This ]
  Okay:

Now I'm freakin crying...you're trying to stop the tears...remember.

j/k

I can't do this now..it needs to sink in.

I'll be back

I Love You
| Posted on 2007-02-23 00:00:00 | by clay | [ Reply to This ]

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