Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Go ahead, Take what dose not Belong to YOU!dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jackz
    ASL Info:    24/F/OH
    Elite Ratio:    3.76 - 591/622/378
    Words: 130
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 552
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 840



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsGo ahead, Take what dose not Belong to YOU!dots
    -------------------------------------------


    Take this from me
    Why don't you?

    Take what does not belong to you!
    You have for so many years...

    Why have you not taken this?
    The only thing going good in my life

    You seem to have great timing
    When it comes to things like this..

    Thinking "maybe it'll be different this time"
    Giving me false hope..

    And right when these walls retract...
    And I begin to show emotion

    You come in for the kill!
    Taking what I have grown use to..
    Taking all I long for

    Now I awake in the morning with a blank mind
    I sleep without those dreams..

    You've taken the only thing that made me smile..
    You've taken my world and turned it upside down!




    Submitted on 2007-02-24 14:13:48     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Hmm this is interesting. I get from this that he raped or not exactly raped but had sex with you which you didnt exactly want. Sorry but that is what i am getting correct me if i am wrong.

    Troubled,
    Jay.
    | Posted on 2007-03-12 00:00:00 | by Flowerinbloom | [ Reply to This ]
      Your writing is very unique.. even on upsetting subjects it comes of joyous somehow. i don't know why lol. one thing i'm not sure about is why you mispelled 'does' as 'dose' you insinuating a dose as in pills or medical doses?
    | Posted on 2007-02-24 00:00:00 | by JAcksonJr | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    135900

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    untitled written by ShyOne
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    Life is moments written by Ramneet
    Etiquette written by saartha
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (5) written by endlessgame23
    Birds of a Feather written by poetotoe
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    Tartarus written by endlessgame23
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The World written by jjd
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    Suffer The Children written by poetotoe
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Cover written by saartha
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    Still Perfectly Flawed written by armand
    Love written by saartha

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry